ManDown Podcast

Why You’re Always Anxious (Even When Nothing’s Wrong) | Ep. 43

Tue, 21 Oct 2025 15:57:00 -0000

You can’t outthink anxiety — but you can learn to understand it.In this episode, Patrick and Ted unpack what anxiety really is, how it hijacks your body and thoughts, and why most of us make it worse by trying to “fix” it.

Patrick brings lessons from the therapy room; Ted brings the reality of battling self-sabotage. Together they unpack how awareness, breathing, and daily habits can help you regulate instead of shut down. This one’s about emotional clarity — not control.

💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com

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00:00 Intro 00:25 Patrick on America 01:11 French Cowboy Boots Are Calling Patrick 01:35 Chili’s Got Cowboy Boots? 02:18 Fashion Kinks: The Allure of Line Dancing and Footwear 07:17 Why Good Jeans Make Everyone Look Great 09:27 Robin vs Taylor Swift 10:22 Taylor Swift + Swedish Producers? 10:58 Attraction Beyond Looks 12:12 Find your Joy 15:39 Seeing Behind People’s Masks 16:47 Patrick Can’t Take Compliments 17:16 Self-Sabotage in Action 19:29 Why Compliments Feel Weird 22:36 Anxiety: What It Really Is 24:00 Understanding Anxiety Symptoms 25:30 The Anxiety Loop 26:00 Slowing Down the Tempo 27:05 Finding the Real Fear 27:50 Pinpointing When Anxiety Starts 29:32 Physical Cues Matter 31:23 Recognising Emotional Impulses and Their Origins 33:07 The Importance of Self-Reflection in Managing Anxiety 35:50 Challenging Negative Automatic Thoughts 37:15 Breaking the Cycle of Anxiety 40:16 Is Your Body Holding Anxiety? 43:29 Sphincter Diamonds 44:16 Continuous Learning and Self-Discovery in Mental Health 47:57 Ted’s Routine for Processing Feelings 50:05 Breaking Down Anxious Thoughts 53:40 Can Discipline Build Emotional Resilience? 54:57 The Power of Affirmations and Self-Belief 56:56 Reprogramming Negative Thoughts 59:16 Understanding Anxiety and Its Triggers 1:01:42 Anxiety Tips/Tools 1:03:19 The Role of Medication and Long-Term Solutions 1:04:30 Outro

Parenting in the Age of Radicalization | Ep. 42

Tue, 14 Oct 2025 14:42:00 -0000

Ted and Patrick kick off with fatherhood, vasectomies, and the chaos of modern life before diving into social media radicalization and how to raise better men. They unpack how algorithms weaponize outrage, why politics feels broken, and what empathy and curiosity can still save. Then it’s on to Taylor Swift's new album, the burnout, and why joy might be her only way forward. Enjoy!

💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

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00:00 – Intro: Taylor Swift’s album and unexpected politics

00:36 – Patrick’s vasectomy waitlist story

01:10 – Ted’s “50% emissions” joke and pregnancy talk

02:17 – SlutCon, fertility, and age gaps in parenting

03:35 – Miscarriage, exhaustion, and parenting at 30+

05:21 – The mental load of fatherhood

06:20 – Patrick’s parenting stories and “Hungry Caterpillar” moment

07:20 – Simple explanations as a superpower

07:55 – Anxiety, media, and radicalization begins

09:10 – The YouTube funnel and algorithmic outrage

10:49 – How right-wing influencers hook young men

12:44 – Why creators drift toward divisive content

14:49 – Jordan Peterson and the pull of extremism

17:13 – Boris, Trump, and populism’s moral void

18:57 – Radicalization and real-world violence

19:53 – Why platforms won’t shut down hate speech

21:10 – The collapse of consequence and fake morality

22:16 – Raising boys in the algorithm era

23:16 – The endless scroll and “slop content” culture

24:13 – Creating positive role models

25:12 – Housing, inequality, and political drift

27:07 – Media narratives vs. real voter concerns

31:23 – Local government and reform myths

33:37 – Depression, vulnerability, and radicalization

35:11 – Escaping social media doom loops

36:08 – Touching grass and finding purpose offline

37:41 – Why the world isn’t as bad as it seems

39:41 – Community and connection

40:15 – Education, critical thinking, and curiosity

43:52 – Raising resilient boys and men

45:45 – Taylor Swift, Elon Musk, and modern fame

47:09 – Taylor’s new album: where’s the fun?

49:27 – Lyrical fatigue and self-parody

51:36 – When success kills creativity

53:10 – Sally Rooney and artistic stagnation

54:10 – What Taylor needs next

56:07 – Cowboy boots and Copenhagen fashion detour

57:28 – Outro: podcast reflections and upcoming break

59:03 – What Man Down meant to Ted and Patrick

1:01:06 – Final thanks, Patreon shoutouts, and goodbye

Avoid First Date Mistakes, Argue Smart & Mindful Media | Ep. 41

Tue, 07 Oct 2025 15:07:00 -0000

Dating can be stressful, arguing can be messy, and social media can mess with your head — Ted and Patrick cover all of it in this episode. Learn how to handle first-date nerves, recognise real chemistry, and decide if a second date is worth your time, all while keeping your dating anxiety in check. They also get into how to argue with your partner without hurting the relationship and why understanding each other’s perspective matters. On top of that, they talk about the impact of the content you consume on your mental well-being and habits that help you stay grounded. This episode is packed with advice to help you navigate dating, relationships, and life with more clarity and confidence.

Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:06 Episode Intro

00:54 Patrick’s Take on Copenhagen… and Hot Dogs

03:18 Ted Visiting Copenhagen

03:42 Guest Pitches, Mafia Dons, and Boy Bands

05:18 Listener Questions

05:33 #1 Navigating Arguments in Relationships

13:44 #2 Dating Anxiety and Connection

21:20 Preparing for a Date

24:15 #3 Long Distance Relationships

24:50 #4 The Impact of Social Media on Dating

27:39 The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health

28:50 The Upside of Dating Apps

29:20 Finding Balance: Managing Social Media Consumption

32:58 #5 Physical Activity and Mental Well-Being

33:06 Patrick’s Fitness and Mental Health Practices

37:08 Ted’s Fitness and Mental Health Practices

38:52 Curating Your Music and Media Experience

43:23 Ranking Segment First Date Activities: What Works Best?

47:46 Date Outfits

48:56 Patrick’s Clothing Tips and Thoughts for Men

53:39 Outro

Why Everyone Else Seems Richer Than You | Ep. 40

Tue, 30 Sep 2025 15:50:00 -0000

Money is one of the biggest sources of stress in modern life—and it can make or break relationships. In this episode of Man Down, Ted and Patrick dive into how money shapes partnerships, why even fair-minded people often see it differently, and how past experiences and upbringing influence our views on contribution, fairness, and security.

They explore why financial stress feels heavier today than ever before, the role social media plays in fueling comparison and “money dysmorphia,” and how couples can start having honest, constructive conversations about money without resentment or conflict. Along the way, Ted and Patrick share their own stories, lessons, and mistakes around money, offering insights that will resonate with anyone navigating finances, relationships, and modern pressures.

💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

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Timestamps: 00:00 Intro Teaser 00:20 Welcome Intro 00:27 Episode Intro 01:01 Ted and Patrick’s Personal Experiences with Money 07:35 Generation Perspectives on Money 08:43 Money, Security, and Morality 09:19The Complexity of Money Conversations in Relationships 10:40 Childhood Influences on Financial Attitudes 19:08 The Social Stigma Around Money 19:47 Navigating Financial Dynamics in Relationships 21:05 The Emotional Toll of Financial Vigilance 21:47 Housing Crisis and Its Impact on Family Planning 24:00 The Long-Term View on Housing and Utilities 25:56 Money Dysmorphia: The Social Media Side Effect 27:20 Population Decline, Immigration Dynamics and Economic Recovery 31:39 The Interpersonal Impact of Money in Relationships 33:40 Navigating Financial Conversations in Relationships 35:17 Taking Control of Personal Finances 35:40 The Challenge of Budgeting and Financial Discipline 38:20 Understanding FIRE and Fat FIRE 39:19 Money and Relationships: The Impact of Financial Views 41:38 Navigating Wealth and Anxiety 42:28 Ted Investing in Friendships Businesses 43:02 Balancing Financial Contributions in Relationships 45:05 10 Million is When People Start to Chill Out Financially 49:26 Ted on Combining Money and Friendships 52:19 Navigating and Understanding what Each Partner Contributes 53:20 Outro

The Achievement Void, ADHD at 30 & Life Without Sleep | Ep.39

Tue, 23 Sep 2025 15:25:00 -0000

In this listener-powered episode, Ted and Patrick tackle the struggles and questions you’ve been sending in. They explore what it’s like to feel unfulfilled even after achieving your dreams, navigate burnout, and figure out the next steps in your career. Patrick shares his thoughts on ADHD in men, including life-changing diagnoses later in adulthood. They dive into the realities of parenting, sleepless nights with a second child, and how to cope when life throws your schedule off balance. The conversation also covers semi-pro and amateur athletes juggling full-time jobs, late nights, and recovery challenges, while Ted reflects on his journey into football versus American football. Packed with vulnerability, insight, and practical advice, this episode examines ambition, identity, and the modern pressures men face today.

💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com
Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast
Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome Intro 00:06 Episode Intro 00:48 Q1 How Ted Got Into Football and Data Analytics 08:58 Q2 Understanding ADHD and Its Impact 17:22 Q3 Navigating Parenthood and Sleep Challenges 24:37 Q4 Optimising Recovery for Athletes With Full-Time Jobs 26:27 Q5 The Reality of Success and Fulfilment 41:48 Q6 Finding Your Path in a Changing World 48:50 Outro 49:27 Broll

Cheating Is It Biology… Or Just Excuses | EP. 38

Tue, 16 Sep 2025 15:03:00 -0000

Cheating isn’t inevitable — but understanding why it happens is crucial. In this episode, Ted and Patrick break down the biology, psychology, and relationship dynamics behind infidelity, and explore practical ways couples can build trust, manage jealousy, and stay connected in today’s modern world.

Topics covered

- Common emotional causes of cheating

- The role of biology vs. excuses

- Why some men cheat and others don’t

- Polyamory, ENM, and modern relationship experiments

- How to strengthen commitment and satisfaction in your relationship

💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com

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Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:07 Episode Intro

00:42 Understanding Cheating: Biological vs Emotional Factors

01:32 Are Men Wired to Cheat?

02:02 Possible Reasons for Cheating

04:34 Are Men Wired to Cheat? Patrick’s Take

06:35 Infidelity: Men vs Women

06:40 The Role of Communication in Relationships

09:42 The Impact of Technology on Cheating

11:00 How Tech & Sexual Diversity Redefine Cheating

12:45 The Hard Work Behind Open Relationships

14:13 Understanding Infidelity and Crisis Points

17:22 The Dynamic of Ethical Non-Monogamy

19:14 Polyamory: Surviving Cheating & Crisis Points

24:25 The Future of Monogamy and Relationship Structures

25:50 Exploring Attraction & Keeping the Spark Alive in Relationships

28:50 When Kids Repeat What They Hear…Hilarious Consequences

30:32 Most Couples Resist Non-Monogamy

31:09 Exploring Flirtation in Relationships

35:40 Outro/Wrap Up

41:02 (Broll - The Rise of Therapy Speak and its Implications, Communication in Academia, The Complexity of Writing Styles)

How to Survive a Breakup (And Find Yourself Again) | Ep.37

Tue, 09 Sep 2025 15:24:00 -0000

Breakups are never easy. But they don’t have to define you. In this episode, Ted and Patrick talk about how to know when it’s time to end a relationship, what to expect emotionally after a breakup, and how to process heartbreak without losing yourself. If you’re struggling with heartbreak—or trying to make sense of the end of a relationship—this episode is your roadmap to healing and growth.

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Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:03 Episode Intro

00:38 Listener Question

00:55 Ted’s Personal Experience and Insights

01:41 Understanding Relationship Dynamics

02:07 John Gottman’s The Four Horsemen

06:30 Recognising When to End a Relationship

08:48 Practicalities of Ending a Relationship

11:11 Reflecting on Past Decisions and Regrets

15:40 Managing Complicated Feelings Post-Breakup16:51 Self-Forgiveness and Moving Forward

27:10 Practical Tips for Moving Forward After Breakup

27:48 Navigating Grief and Loss

29:40 Understanding Mourning Frameworks

30:32 Reclaiming Identity Post-Breakup

36:30 Self-Discovery After a Relationship

37:36 The Journey of Personal Growth

40:39 Practical Steps for Healing

46:29 Seeking Professional Help

47:34 New Podcast Segment

48:13 Choice Ranking Round 1

58:10 Choice Ranking Round 2

1:10:21 Outro

Porn, AI, and the End of Real Relationships? | Ep. 36

Tue, 02 Sep 2025 14:45:00 -0000

On this episode, Patrick and Ted discuss porn, technology, and the future of intimacy. They dive into how you can tell if you have a problem with porn, the future of technology and how it will change our porn consumption, and the impacts porn may have on relationships and dating in the future. The episode ends with the guys sharing some new discoveries they have made. Enjoy!

Porn Consumption Scale: https://bpbcounseling.com/blog/problematic-pornography-consumption-scale

💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com

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Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

04:20- Patrick's Holiday + the Danes are normal sized

05:38 - Ted's Holday

07:35 - Guiding your children's music taste

10:05 - Demon Hunters

12:53 - Porn, VR, AI, Sex Dolls

14:56 - Sex Toys

17:32 - Partners see Porn as Infidelity?

18:59 - So is smut cheating also?

21:27 - There is a threshold at which you take away from your partner

22:27 - Self-described porn addiction and the negative effects that come with it

23:26 - Most of you are probably fine!

26:06 - Taking the survey will help you realize you're probably ok

27:25 - Positive cases for porn and masturbation

28:55 - Porn in a healthy relationship perspective

30:53 - Porn = Cheating is a misunderstanding and an insecurity

33:15 - Anti-porn movement from men (No fap/semen retention)

36:52 - The world needs more Dom's and the undiscussed labor cost of them

38:30 - Open relationship does NOT equal not thinking about other people

39:43 - Downsides of porn even of use that isn't addiction levels

41:30 - Ted's recent dating experience

42:48 - We get skewed perspectives, but that might be about yourself and not your partner

44:16 - For some people the only women they've seen close up are women in porn

44:36 - Concerns with advances in porn technology

45:20 - Robots in film

47:00 - VR and augmented reality porn

48:12 - Deep fakes and the dangers of this technology

49:44 - Could this end up making people scared of the dating market?

50:20 - Connection greatly enhances an experience

51:55 - Paying for porn helps ensure nobody is being exploited

53:00 - Sex is front and center and NORMAL throughout human history

53:55 - The Roman's had porn

54:20 - New discoveries Ted has made recently

54:38 - Forgiving yourself for taking time off working out on vacation

55:44 - Renting different brands of cars can be a difficult learning curve

57:30 - Different locations of buttons and tools in new cars

59:34 - Patrick is the 3rd most famous Patrick that is a Leo

1:00:15 - Patrick's discovery - The Runner app

1:03:25 - Lord of the Rings walking to Mount Doom for Medals

The Balance Trap, Not My Type & Haunted by Mistakes | Ep. 35

Thu, 21 Aug 2025 16:46:00 -0000

In this episode Ted and Patrick dive into real-life listener questions, tackling topics like staying present with your partner and kids while managing a demanding career, navigating dating when someone isn’t your “type” but has a strong emotional connection, and finding self-forgiveness while making peace with past mistakes. 💬 Send us your questions in the comments or at mandownpodcast@varianceincorporated.com

Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:07 Episode Intro

00:42 Why Hiring a Cleaner Isn’t as Simple as You Think

04:38 Reader Questions

05:04 #1 Navigating Physical and Emotional Attraction

14:17 #2 Balancing Work and Family Life

25:45 #3 Finding Self-Forgiveness and Peace

43:55 #4 Rewiring Your Brain for Better Habits

50:00#5 What Scene in Lost in Translation Made Patrick Cry?

52:08 Art Doesn’t Always Need to Make Sense

54:00 Outro (Subscribe and Send Us Your Questions)

Hidden Ways You’re Self-Sabotaging—And How to Change It | Ep. 34

Thu, 14 Aug 2025 17:08:00 -0000

Why do we keep getting in our own way — even when we want something badly?

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dig into the deeper psychology of self-sabotage: what it really is, why it happens, and how to break the cycle for good.

We’ll unpack:

- Why “self-sabotage” isn’t a diagnosis — and what it’s really a symptom of

- How fragile self-worth and old beliefs quietly shape destructive patterns

- The many ways self-sabotage shows up in your career, creative work, and relationships

- Why some of these behaviours feel protective — even when they hurt you

- The traps that keep you stuck on repeat (and how to see them before they happen)

- Practical ways to break the cycle and move forward with confidence

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Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:07 Episode Intro

00:49 Ted’s Trip to Santa Barbara

02:29 When It’s Time to Stop Wallowing

02:49 Holding Space Without Holding On

03:13 How We Torture Ourselves With Old Pain

03:55 The Power of Putting It Away

04:14 Patrick’s Life Updates & Milestones

05:19 The Third Child Nightmare

06:47 When Your Partner’s Dream Turns Into Your Problem

08:24 Seeing Self-Sabotage Across Life

09:39 Understanding Self-Sabotage

10:21 Patterns of Behaviour and Fear of Failure

10:55 Self-Sabotage as a Symptom

12:35 The Inertia Behind Self-Sabotage

16:03 Embracing Failure and Taking Risks

20:01 The Fragile Sense of Self and External Validation

22:47 Embracing Failure in the Creative Process

23:42 The Cycle Of Learning and Self-Improvement

26:57 Understanding Procrastination and its Roots

27:51 Finding Limits and Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

30:16 Creating for Yourself vs. Seeking External Validation

33:06 The Impact of Procrastination on Life Choices

37:31 Self-Sabotage in Relationships

48:34 Avoidant Behaviour and its Consequences

53:11 Summary & Final Thoughts on Self-Sabotage

54:29 The Value of Vulnerability and Effort

57:49 Outro

Guilty Pleasures, Relationship Habits & Defining Moments | Ep. 33

Thu, 07 Aug 2025 15:54:00 -0000

We’re back with another round — and this time, the producers put Ted and Patrick through the wringer.

20+ rapid-fire questions. No prep. No time to think. Just off-the-cuff answers.

You’ll hear which guilty pleasure Patrick refuses to feel guilty about, the fictional characters they irrationally relate to, and why Ted’s had a horror movie aversion since he was 10 years old.

And trust us — it only gets better from there.If you love honest, funny, and unexpectedly revealing stories, this episode is for you.

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Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:05 Episode Intro

00:31 From Desk Fans to Deep Questions — Things Escalated Fast

04:35 Quick Fire Questions

05:15 The Moment Everything Shifted

09:01 Ted & Patrick’s Life Warning Labels

10:11 Ted’s Opening Book Scene

12:50 The Compliment That Low-Key Insults You

14:03 What People Totally Get Wrong About Us

18:29 Known for Mind, Heart, or Impact?

22:47 Guilty Pleasures Ted and Patrick Own

24:41 The Habit That Keeps Relationships Strong

27:34 Fictional Characters We Secretly Relate To

28:21 When Did We Last Surprise Ourselves?

32:29 Trend Phases We Fully Committed to (And Regret)

33:47 Qualities We Admire but Struggle to Cultivate

35:44 Surprising Bucket List Dreams

38:00 Whose Creative Brain Would We Steal for a Day?

41:44 The Boldest Clapback in Classical Music History

42:24 The Skill We Wish We Had

43:08 Favourite City/Country to visit

44:10 Advice That Actually Stuck

45:31 Favourite Thing About Each Other

49:24 Go-To Comfort Meal

52:04 Things We Changed Our Mind About Recently

55:23 Top 5 Favourite Films

59:27 A Mistake We Made Once—and Never Repeated

1:03:23 Outro

How Much Is Poor Sleep Costing You? Tips to Sleep Better | Ep. 32

Tue, 05 Aug 2025 15:41:00 -0000

Sleep impacts everything—from your physical health to mental clarity—but it’s often overlooked. In this episode, Ted and Patrick break down why sleep matters and how small changes can lead to big improvements. No guilt, no pressure—just practical tips to help you fall asleep easier, stay asleep longer, and feel better every day. Prioritising your sleep could be the key to a better, longer life.

Show Notes

🧠 Therapist Anne Brown https://www.annebrownpsychotherapy.com/

Sleep Research

Huberman:

• View sunlight within 30–60 mins of waking & before sunset

• Wake/sleep at consistent times—don’t push past sleepiness

• No caffeine within 8–10 hours of bedtime

• Use the Reveri app (iOS) for sleep-focused self-hypnosis (3x/week)

• Avoid bright overhead lights between 10 pm–4 am

• If awake at night, try NSDR or Yoga Nidra (on YouTube) • You might consider taking (30-60 min before bed):

145mg Magnesium Threonate or 200mg Magnesium Bisglycinate

50mg Apigenin

100-400mg Theanine

(3-4 nights per week I also take 2g of Glycine and 100mg GABA.)

*I would start with one supplement (or none!) and then add one at a time as needed.

**Don’t take theanine if you have overly intense dreams, sleep-walk, or have night terrors.

***Also, some people (~5%), get an agitated stomach from magnesium supplementation, in which case, do not take it.

Bryan Johnson Habits:

• Build a nightly wind-down routine (30–60 mins)

An online randomized clinical trial on 991 subjects concluded that reading a book in bed improved sleep quality in a majority of participants, as self-reported by the participants using SQS scoring.

In a wide meta analysis, mindfulness meditation outperformed controls and proved equivalent to medications in treating sleep disturbances.

In a study on 94 students, soothing classical music outperformed a negative control and an audiobook at improving sleep quality and reducing depression. In older adults too, a meta analysis of 9 studies with 489 participants showed significant improvements with sleep latency, duration, and efficiency with various music interventions in multiple settings and countries.

• Cool room temperature between 60-67°F (15-19°C).

• Eat your last meal 2–4+ hours before sleeping

• Try to avoid caffeine, alcohol, and other stimulants at least 10 hours before sleep. Caffeine has a half life of 6 hours in the blood. That means that consuming a cup of coffee 6 hours before bedtime is equivalent to drinking half a cup immediately before going to bed!

Alcohol reduces REM sleep, increases sleep fragmentation (frequent awakenings), and can exacerbate existing medical conditions

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Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:05 Episode Intro

01:20 Thank You For Coming To The Meet Up

01:48 Live Podcast?

02:35 Sleep Hygiene and Its Challenges

03:48 Why We Are Talking About Sleep

05:37 Sleep Training and Family Dynamics

07:13 How Patrick Optimises his Sleep

08:09 Quality vs Quantity

09:15 The Impact of Sleep on Cognitive Function

10:32 Your Morning Routine Cannot Outrun Terrible Sleep

10:51 What Made Ted Prioritise Sleep

12:46 Tired Ted vs. Sleep-Deprived Patrick

14:35 Research on Sleep in Sports

18:24 The Importance of Sleep for Athletes

19:18 Sleep Fuels Performance

21:23 Circadian Rhythms and Performance

22:35 Optimising Sleep for Daily Life

25:06 Therapist Recommendation

26:29 Sleep Research from Huberman and Johnson

29:13 Sleep Tips and Strategies

36:05 The Importance of Sleep Awareness

38:43 Recap of Tips and More Hygiene Strategies

42:29 Supplements and Sleep Hygiene

48:25 Better Sleep, Better You

50:09 The Role of Nutrition in Sleep Quality

51:19 Outro

Advice to Younger Self, Lost In Dating & Motivation Slumps | Ep.31

Thu, 31 Jul 2025 16:45:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick tackle your questions—no filters, no fluff. They talk about what they’d tell their younger selves, the frustrating reality of feeling out of sync in dating, and what to do when motivation is nowhere to be found. Plus, they dive into one of the weirdest relationship dilemmas yet: what happens when friends refuse to call a partner by his nickname?

Expect real talk, a few laughs, and the kind of honest advice you wish you’d heard years ago.

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJwX: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:10 Episode intro

01:11 Q1 Reflections on Being

1707:25 Q2 Navigating Relationships in Your 20s

11:54 Q3 Motivation and Habit Formation

19:42 Q4 Workplace Gossip

27:12 Reddit Post: Navigating Nickname

35:10 Quick Fire Round Questions

35:49 Q1 Two Favourite Female Musical Artists

40:33 Q2 Favourite Male Actor

45:36 Q3 Thing Most Evangelical About From The Last Year

47:25 Q4 Thing Trying to Change About Self

53:58 Patrick’s Other Podcast ‘Unseen Incidents’

55:34 Kitchen Appliances

56:09 College American Football Names (The Humour in Names)

58:51 Outro

59:16 Broll (College Football Name Winner)

The Self-Improvement Nobody Talks About | Ep. 30

Tue, 29 Jul 2025 15:51:00 -0000

Most self-improvement advice focuses on productivity hacks or getting in shape — but what if there’s a different side to growth that we rarely talk about?

In this episode, Ted and Patrick explore how self-improvement can mean reconnecting with beauty, curiosity, and joy in everyday life. It’s about going beyond the grind, finding meaning in small moments, and developing yourself in ways that actually make life richer and more fulfilling.

If you’re tired of hustle culture’s narrow view of success and want to discover a broader, more meaningful approach to self-improvement, this conversation is for you.

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:08 Episode Intro

00:55 The Balance of Sadness and Happiness

04:35 Time it Takes to Become Emotionally Available

05:07 Running vs Lifting

07:44 Patrick on Running and Fitness

09:27 Love and Hate Relationship of Running

11:28 Patrick’s Love for Lifting

12:08 Patrick on Making Running Fun

12:31 Going Full Coffee Nerd

13:42 Romanticising Your Life: A New Perspective on Self-Improvement 15:57 Patrick Alternative Ideas of Self-Improvement

16:57 Your Job Doesn’t Have to Be Your Purpose

18:04: Why We Started This Podcast in the First Place

18:33 The Good Life Is Simpler Than You Think

19:10 Screw Hustle Culture. Just Care About Something

19:52 Patrick’s Self-Improvement Check-List

20:28 The Importance of Diverse Interests

23:00 Challenge Yourself For Growth

26:00 Comic Books Were My First Cinematic Universe

27:00 Low-Load, High-Load: Why We Reach for Different Things

28:12 Your Media Habits Are Emotional Clues

29:00 Growth Means Giving Up a Bit of Comfort

30:50 Romanticising Your Life: What It Means

33:15 Diagnostics for a Richer Life

36:50 Transforming Chores into Pleasures

37:09 Creating Beauty in Everyday Life

43:00 Rekindling the Spark in Relationships

45:26 You Don’t Have to Choose Between Masculine & Beautiful

46:23 The Men You Admire Were Artists Too

46:41 You Can Be a Man and Like Nice Smells

47:00 Patrick on Passion Beyond the Basics

47:58 Entertainment Choices: Quality Over Quantity

52:52 Ted on Reading Smut

53:30 Ted on the Surprising Intimacy of Reading Together

54:52 Patrick & Ted on Unexpected Movie Discoveries and Timeless Soundtracks

56:37 Living in a Rich Media Environment

56:47 Assessing Life and Entertainment Choices

59:15 Outro

Why Men Are Struggling to Make (and Keep) Friends | Ep. 29

Thu, 24 Jul 2025 16:05:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into why it’s so hard for men today to make and keep close friends. From the rise of loneliness to the disappearing social rituals that once held men together, we unpack the crisis facing modern brotherhood.

They also explore real ways men can rebuild connection, step up to the challenge, and find meaningful friendship again. If you’ve been feeling isolated, disconnected, or unsure how to reach out, this conversation is for you. Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast 🎧New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday - Subscribe & hit the bell so you never miss one. Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:07 Episode Intro

01:28 Friendship in Your 30s

02:45 The Challenges of Adult Friendships

04:05 Navigating One-Side Friendships

08:50 The Importance of Vulnerability in Friendships

10:40 Being Honest to Save the Friendship

13:02 Some Friendships Drain You More Than They Should

15:00 Building Meaningful Connections

15:19 ManDown & TTF Meet Up

15:55 When Guy Time Gets Replaced by Group Time

17:20 The Impact of Life Changes on Friendships

18:17 Navigating Male Friendships

19:06 The Challenge of Making New Friends

27:35 Ending Friendships and Moving On

30:24 Test the Relationship — See What Happens

32:55 The Awkward Truth About Men Making Friends

35:31 Cultural Shifts in Social Interactions

38:18 The Art of Ending a Friendship (With Style)

40:20 Friendship Isn’t Easy—But It’s Worth It

41:22 TikTok Trend: Men Calling Each Other Good Night

42:17 Calls Over Texts in a Digital World

43:44 Quick Fire Questions (New Podcast Segment)

44:10 Q1 Biggest Waste of Money Ever

48:31 Q2 Most Complimented On

49:09 One Compliment That Scares Ted

50:39 Q3 Do You Believe in Free-Will?

52:20 Q4 Piece of Art You Would Recommend to Anyone

56:52 Q5 Is There A Piece of Art That Everyone Loves, But You Hate

59:46 Q6 What Moment Divides Your Life Into Before and After?

1:02:36 Politics & Religion

1:03:27 Outro

Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared To Start Therapy | Ep. 28

Tue, 22 Jul 2025 14:48:00 -0000

Therapy can be uncomfortable. But avoiding it costs way more.

In this episode, Ted and Patrick break down what holds men back from starting therapy, how to get the most out of it, and what to expect once you’re in the room. Whether you’ve been thinking about going or still feel unsure, this is a good place to start.

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

🎧New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday - Subscribe & hit the bell so you never miss one.

Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:09 Episode Intro

00:35 The Podcast as Therapy

01:08 Two Perspectives: The Therapist and the Newcomer

01:21 Starting the Conversation on Mental Health

01:47 Why People Resist Therapy

05:38 The Breakdown That Started the Healing

11:30 Men and Emotional Processing

15:30 The Importance of Therapy as a Diagnostic Tool

15:47 Signs You Might Need Therapy

21:08 Navigating Grief and Future Relationships

22:33 The Value of Professional Support

24:20 Communication and Understanding in Therapy

26:15 Understanding Trauma and it's Misuse

29:30 The Role of Therapy in Self-Discovery

30:16 The Therapist-Client Dynamic

35:25 Navigating Emotional Vulnerability

36:16 Self-Reflection and Future Goals

38:30 The Importance of Self-Discovery in Therapy

40:07 Recognising Personal Strengths

41:48 Embracing Emotional Experiences

45:42 The Challenge of Self-Identity

51:15 Building Trust and Repairing Relationships

52:55 The Importance of Hard Conversations

54:30 Therapy as a Tool for Self-Understanding

55:20 Worthy of Love: Rebuilding Self-Worth

58:40 Navigating Therapy: Finding the Right Fit

1:24 Outro

The Friend Zone, Dating Burnout, and Sexual Insecurity | Ep. 27

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 15:46:00 -0000

Are we just close friends — or something more?

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the grey areas of modern dating and masculinity, sparked by real questions from our listeners. We unpack what it means when emotional chemistry feels like more than friendship, how to deal with dating burnout, and the unspoken fears many men have around sexual inexperience and insecurity.

Whether you're stuck in the friend zone, tired of being the only one putting in effort, or wrestling with body count anxiety — this one's for you.

Show Notes

Cera Gibson clip credit @ceradaddygibson https://www.youtube.com/shorts/3dFHa31qxQ8

Come as You Are - Book by Emily Nagoski

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJwX: https://x.com/ManDownPodcastBluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmhoInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:04 Episode Intro

01:14 Reader comment #1 People-Pleasing

08:03 Is the Friend Zone Really a Problem?

01:47 Reader comment #2 Navigating Emotional Intimacy With Friendship

09:51 Reader comment #3 Taking Breaks from Romance and Focusing on Self

11:05 Comment Part 1: Dating Burnout

13:33 Comment Part 2: Dating Expectations vs Reality

16:39 How Ted Approaches Dating

17:50 Cheap Date Ideas

18:32 Don’t put some much pressure on yourself

19:50 Ted’s Two Low-Key Date Ideas

21:37 Rejection Feels Better When You’re True to Yourself

22:27 Reader comment #4 Body Count

24:00 Inexperienced Doesn’t Mean Inadequate

31:08 Why Bigger Isn’t Always Better

38:22 Reader comment #5 Friendship Fallout

41:03 Patrick’s Tips on How To Approach Repairing Broken Friendships

41:52 Ted Thoughts on Approaching Broken Friendships

47:31 Outro

48:31 Broll (Impressions, Accents and Nostalgia)

The Dating App Lie No One Talks About | Ep. 26

Tue, 15 Jul 2025 14:46:00 -0000

Why does dating feel so much harder for men today? In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the hidden struggles men face in the age of dating apps and swipe culture — from feeling invisible and overlooked, to battling confusing “rules” and social atrophy that’s making real connection almost impossible.

They break down why dating apps, instead of helping, might actually be making us worse at connecting — and why so many men feel lost and unsure of who to be in modern dating. If you’ve ever felt frustrated by ghosting, “confirm the date” pressures, or just the overwhelming noise of digital romance, this episode is for you.

Finally, they also explore how distorted ideas of masculinity are shaping men’s experiences — and what real, meaningful connection could look like in today’s world.
Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Show Notes:

slutstack article referenced in the episode https://sluts.substack.com/p/play-stupid-games-win-stupid-prizesJohn Mulaney credit WIRED 2018 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psbIKH5tqiM

Timestamps:

00:00 Welcome Intro

00:11 Episode Intro

01:06 Challenges of Real-Life Connection in the Dating World

03:07 The Decline of Dating Apps and Social Engagement

07:11 Why Everyone Feels Like an NPC

12:47 Social Media Controversies in Dating Culture

17:00 Navigating Compatibility and Blind Dates

18:38 The Role of Community in Dating

22:20 Masculinity and the Modern Man

26:00 Gentleness and Emotional Intelligence

30:00 Creating Opportunities for Connection

33:46 Respecting Boundaries and Self-Worth

35:40 The Human Connection in Online Dating

36:44 Tate, the Manosphere, and Faux Masculinity

38:40 Our Real Enemy: Simplistic, Misogynistic Thinking

40:00 What Is a Good Man Anymore?

40:53 Make Yourself the Product — Then Choose Wisely

41:03 Let People Fail You — Then Set Boundaries

42:11 Know Your Value, But Stay Humble

43:27 Do Men Mature Into Tenderness?

44:22 Personal Development and Relationships

46:40 Understanding Fatherhood and Self-Forgiveness

48:26 Finding Role Models and Intentional Living

51:05 Outro

51:38 Broll (Exploring Celebrity Crushes and Kinks, fun vs funny)

Finding Purpose, Approaching Women & The Happiness Trap | Ep. 25

Thu, 26 Jun 2025 14:59:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick answer listener questions about careers, dating, and meaning.

They dive into the frustration of being stuck in a 9-5 with no clear path forward, the emotional toll of job rejections despite having degrees, and the disconnect between achievement and fulfilment.

They also unpack one of the biggest unspoken fears: how to actually approach women — not just with confidence, but with intention.

00:00 Intro

01:23 Question #1 Emotional Expression & Empathy Gap

08:14 Question #2 Finding Purpose With Work

08:29 The Upsides of a 9-5 Job

09:16 Finding Meaning and Fulfilment Beyond Work

11:29 Question #3 Navigating the Job Market

13:08 Find Work That Feels Like Play

14:15 Are Degrees Worth It?

15:31 Current Job Market Realities
17:51 Question #4 How To Approach Women

22:35 Outro (Give Us Feedback!)

How to Build Confidence Without Faking It | Ep. 24

Tue, 24 Jun 2025 13:44:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick unpack the blurry line between confidence and arrogance. They explore what it means to build real confidence—not just perform it—and how to root it in genuine self-worth. Drawing from their experiences as public voices in football commentary, they ask: How do you know when you’re veering into arrogance? What does it take to stay grounded while still backing yourself? From handling criticism to building inner systems for self-belief, this is a sharp, honest conversation about identity, feedback, and the work of becoming truly self-assured.

Show Notes:

The Transfer Flow newsletter referenced in the episode

https://www.thetransferflow.com/p/be-intellectually-honest-but-f-ck-a-hater-89d0

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:43 Why Patrick and Ted’s Football Takes Get Called Arrogant

02:48 Defining Self-Worth, Confidence and Arrogance

04:13 Why Ted Responded to Arrogance Criticism: Cultural Clashes & Track Record Explained

09:28 Patrick Shares His Perspective on Being Labeled Arrogant

11:28 Ted’s Reply to Criticism — Featured in the TransferFlow Newsletter
14:58 Abilities vs. Qualities: The Arrogance Line

16:00 What does it mean to be self-confident?

19:38 The Roots of Ted’s Self-Confidence

22:06 It’s Okay to Fail — Your Worth Isn’t Defined by One Outcome

24:30 Confidence grows from self-worth

27:00 Expertise vs. Overconfidence

29:35 We learn self-worth at school, but not how to explore it.

29:50 We all share the same journey of failure and growth.

30:18 How Patrick earned the right to claim more confidence
31:50 Ted’s Advice on Confidence

35:20 Patrick’s Take: Internal Qualities and Self-Worth

38:38 Social Media: Where Toxicity Meets Opportunity

41:40 Low Self-Worth: Influences & Inner Voice

46:30 Two Paths After Arrogance: Denial or Growth

47:40 Ted on Dismissing Earned Praise and Compliments

52:39 Why Some People Struggle to Accept Compliments

55:00 Patrick’s Struggle With Praise and Self-Worth

56:40 How to Respond When Your Partner Rejects a Compliment
57:30 Why Working on Your Self-Worth Matters

58:52 Patrick’s Thoughts on Being Called Arrogant

1:02:19 Ted on Constantly Growing His Expertise

1:04:34 Patrick on Saying ‘I Don’t Know’

1:07:20 Tips for Rebuilding Self-Talk and Setting Boundaries

1:16:55 Wrap-Up & Reflections

1:19:12 Outro

1:19:27 Broll

If You’re Avoiding Hard Conversations... This Is For You | Ep. 23

Thu, 19 Jun 2025 15:23:00 -0000

Avoiding hard conversations can hold you back in your relationships, career, and personal growth. In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into practical frameworks to help you start and navigate those tough talks with confidence — without losing your cool or shutting down.

You’ll learn:

- Why we resist difficult conversations and how to overcome it

- How to mentally prepare before the talk to minimise emotional triggers

- What to say, what not to say, and how to express yourself clearly

- How to stay calm and listen actively, even when things get tense

- Ways to reflect on the outcomes and decide your next steps

Whether it’s about money, family, or your relationship, this episode is for anyone who’s been avoiding “that talk.” Real change starts with speaking your truth — and we’re here to guide you through it.

Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 01:05 Hard Conversations for Ted 02:08 Hard Conversations for Patrick 03:43 Avoid the Talk. Pay the Price. 06:13 Intro into Navigating Hard Conversations 07:30 Where Does the Stress Start? 13:30 Hard Conversations Ted is Good at Having 14:12 Understanding Personal Triggers in Conversations It Starts With an Honest Conversation 16:09 Negotiating Vulnerability in Tough Talks 18:41 Finding Common Ground in Hard Conversations 20:08 Navigating Hard Conversations 24:50 How to Prepare for Tough Talks 28:20 Strategies for Effective Communication 28:50 Prepare, Script, and Influence: Keys to Effective Hard Talks 33:00 The Importance of Follow-Up 34:11 How to Stay Open and Collaborative in Hard Conversations 39:30 Building Long-Term Relationships Through Communication 44:15 How Patrick Approaches Hard Conversations 46:45 Navigating Unexpected Conversations 52:55 The Importance of Reflection and Follow-Up 53:31 Wrapping It Up: Patrick’s Advice on Hard Conversations 56:55 If Patrick and Ted Had a Hard Conversation… 58:05 Outro (Wit vs Puns, Mission Impossible, Jackie Chan, follow us on social media)

Body Count, Spark & Sex — Unpopular Takes That Actually Make Sense | Ep. 22

Tue, 17 Jun 2025 12:50:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the relationship opinions no one wants to admit — but everyone needs to hear.

From the myth of the “spark” on the first date to body count, casual sex, and whether men and women can really just be friends — we’re unpacking the unpopular takes that actually make sense when you look a little closer.

If you’re tired of surface-level dating advice and want something real, intentional, and honest — this one’s for you.

Timestamps:

0:00 Intro

00:50 Unpopular Opinion #1 Cut Ties with Your Ex Before You Date

02:49 Unpopular Opinion #2 Men and Women Can’t Be Just Friends

09:48 The Versions of Ourselves We Close Off

11:57 Parenting and Personal Identity

14:13 When Your Toddler Repeats the Unrepeatable

15:26 Unpopular Opinion #3 Losing Your Virginity Is Overhyped

22:00 Unpopular Opinion #4 Expecting spark on first date

24:00 Signs There’s a Spark on a Date

25:45 Reasons/causes of no spark on first date - why you should give a person a second chance

27:45 First Impressions & Attraction

29:00 Passive vs Active Dating

32:11 Unpopular Opinion #5 If It’s Not a Special Occasion, Go Half

33:37 Unpopular Opinion #6 There Is One Person for Everyone

35:40 Unpopular Opinion #7 If It’s Right, It Will Be Easy

38:47 Unpopular Opinion #8 High Body Count? I’m Out

43:00 How Important is the Number?

48:33 Bonus Unpopular Opinion

48:15 The $15k Girlfriend: When Dating Gets Transactional

48:38 Old School vs. New School: Dating as a Marketplace

49:13 Patrick filling Ted’s emotional hole

49:50 Dating, But Make It a Business Deal

52:24 Marriage Math: What Is a Stay-at-Home Parent Worth?

53:38 Talking Money, Kids & Roles — Before Marriage

58:50 Love Can’t Be an Equation — Can It?

59:20 It’s Not Romance — It’s Strategy

1:00:20 The Dynamics of Financial Support in Relationships

1:05:40 The Complexity of Emotional and Financial Support

1:08:29 When Sex Work Enters the Relationship Zone

1:09:15 Relationships Are Never 50/50

1:12:37 Outro (send us your questions!)

How to Find Your Style as a Man (No Fashion Knowledge Needed) | Ep. 21

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 12:50:00 -0000

What if your clothes weren’t just about looking good — but about being seen?

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive deep into the intersection of fashion, masculinity, and identity. Why do so many men keep it muted, minimal, and safe — and why does anything beyond that feel off-limits?

They explore:

The fear of standing out vs. the desire to be respected
The myth of “I’ll dress better once I’m in shape”
How minimalism became the emotional safe zone for men
Why style is still seen as feminine unless you’re famous or jacked
And how dressing well can change your self-image — even if you’re a dad with no time

Also: watches, knits, trainers, and why you don’t need to be stylish to start caring about style.

This isn’t about trends. It’s about ownership. Of your look, your energy, and your right to feel good in your skin.

Follow us on our Socials:YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJwX: https://x.com/ManDownPodcastBluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmhoInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:45 Fashion and Masculinity: How Menswear Got Deep

01:47 Expressing Yourself Through What You Wear

05:05 When Clothes Feel Like a Spotlight: Fear of Being Seen

06:16 Minimalism: Love or Loathe?

08:28 How Dressing Well Became an Act of Self-Respect

10:39 What Set Ted on His Style Path

12:10 Body Image and Clothing Choices

14:51 Why Good Shape Doesn’t Equal Good Style

15:30 The Awkward Phase of Teen Fashion

15:57 Ted’s Cashmere Hoodie: Casual Meets Class

16:40 Practical Fashion: Finding Joy in Dressing Well

18:37 Breaking Free from ‘Minimalism’ and Embracing Expression

19:54 Elevated Basics & The Myth of Effortless Style

21:26 The Thrifting Experience

25:23 When Style Meets Sustainability

28:00 Why Men’s Fashion Can Feel Like a Body-Shaming Club

30:03 Cultural Influences on Fashion Choices

30:50 Finding Your Unique Look and Owning It

33:30 How to Peacock Subtly: Suits, Ties, and Statement Pieces

36:18 Why Knitwear Is Worth the Investment

37:08 Ted’s Watch Collection

41:44 Ted’s Favourite Shoes

43:33 Fashion as Personal Expression

45:00 Breaking the Mold: Dressing Outside Traditional Masculine Silhouettes

45:48 The Danger of Getting Hooked on Watches & Sneakers

47:03 Why Dropping 30K on Brunello Cuccinelli Is a Pose

47:33 Outerwear: The First Step into Men’s Fashion

48:22 Male Fashion: More Than Just Trousers and T-Shirts

48:30 Breaking Down Men’s Jewelry Preferences

50:24 Ted’s Leather Bomber Quest

50:38 Ted’s Top Knitwear Picks and Brand Recommendations

56:12 Why Thrifted Knitwear & Vintage Coats Are Worth It

01:01:53 Ted’s Thrifting Adventures with a Model

01:02:55 Patrick’s Simple Trick for Finding Quality Fabrics

01:04:02 When Fashion Talk Turns to Rap

01:07:05 Practical Thrifting Tips

01:13:00 Ted and Patrick: London Meet Up

01:14:52 Patrick & Ted on Comfort, Confidence & Having Fun With Clothes

01:15:15 Finding Your Style: Embracing Individuality in Fashion

01:22:12 Exploring Fashion Beyond Gender Norms & Finding Your Personal Style

01:23:24 Outro

Anger Isn’t the Problem — Avoiding It Is | Ep.20

Tue, 27 May 2025 13:17:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick explore the important topic of male anger and masculinity. Feeling angry is completely normal—and it can actually be useful.

Anger isn’t just something to fear or bottle up. It’s a powerful signal that something needs your attention. But many men struggle to express it in healthy ways, which can lead to either shutting it down or letting it explode in damaging ways.

Ted and Patrick break down the anger cycle, explain why many hide their anger behind other feelings, and share practical, constructive tips to help you manage anger without losing control or hurting the people around you.

If you want to understand your anger and learn how to work with it, this episode is for you.

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps-

00:00 Intro

00:29 Growing Up with Anger

02:15 The Two Types of Anger: Feeling It Too Much or None at All

02:40 Ted Reflects on His Own Anger and Emotional Growth

03:20 Realising You Don’t Have to Bottle Emotions Up

04:00 How Fatherhood Changed Ted’s View on Anger

04:33 Anger is Normal and Healthy Emotion

05:10 The Problem Isn’t Anger, It’s Control

06:10 Men Report More Anger—But Seek Less Help

06:27 Verbal Aggression Isn’t Just a Male Thing

06:40 Uncontrolled Anger Peaks in Young Adulthood

07:30 The Long-Term Cost of Persistent Anger

08:44 Self-immolation as expression

09:30 Would You Rather Be Right or Influential?

11:15 Anger into Influence: Ted's Practical Walkthrough

14:14 Breaking Down The Anger Cycle

17:22 Reclaiming Power by Choosing Not to React

18:30 The Fuel Behind the Fire: Understanding What Triggers You

20:20 Why Anger Can Feel Like Power and Addiction

23:00 When Anger Becomes a Weapon and a Source of Identity

24:58 Understanding Anger as a Normal Emotion

25:45 The Gender Dynamics of Anger

26:30 Processing Anger and Apologies

29:40 Unresolved Anger in Relationships

31:28 The Concept of Closure in Relationships

34:30 The Art of Setting Boundaries with People Who Don’t Change

37:13 The Dangers of Repressed Anger

39:00 Childhood Experiences Shape How Deal With Anger

40:22 Scared of Letting Anger Out

41:30 Conflict as a Path to Growth

43:00 Navigating Disagreements Constructively

44:40 Signs Repressing Anger

45:40 Accepting Emotions and Finding Balance

49:00 Constructive Concepts

1:02:33 Outro

Fitness Lies, Can’t Be With the One You Love & the Prenup Debate | Ep. 19

Thu, 22 May 2025 09:25:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick answer your questions — from diet scams and supplement lies to what happens when you fall for someone you can’t be with. They then react to a Reddit thread and share their insights and opinions on the authors’ posts. It opens up a raw conversation about money, career sacrifice, power dynamics, and what fairness really looks like in modern relationships.

AITA thread:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/d7b5e1/aita_for_calling_off_my_wedding_because_my_stbh/

00:00 Intro

01:18 Diet and Fitness Lies - Reader Question #1

01:39 Why Dieting Feels Impossible for Some People

02:07 Ozempic & Wegovy: The New ‘Cheat Code’ for Willpower?

03:12 The Dark Side of Keto

03:29 Cutting Through Diet Scams: Focus on Protein

04:42 Patrick & Ted’s Go-To Protein Shakes

08:25 Increase Your Fibre Intake

08:52 Ditch the Diet Myths: Focus on Protein and Real Food

09:58 No More Cheat Meals: Balance Your Diet Without Guilt

11:07 Healthy Habits: Meal Prep & Consistency

12:35 Fasting, Willpower Hacks & How to Beat Soda Cravings

14:23 No Magic Bullets: Real Talk on Supplements

15:02 Huel and Protein Shakes to Stop Snack Attacks

16:00 Build Your Routine Slowly

16:35 Ted’s ‘Boy Dinner’ & Finding What Works for You

17:14 The Truth About Sugar-Free Sodas

18:11 Food Prep, Fitness, and Self-Compassion

19:20 Listen to Your Body

20:34 Are You Absorbing Vitamin D?

20:50 What Salt Cravings Really Mean

21:46 Cravings as Your Body’s Natural Signals

24:00 Keep It Simple: Basics Before Complexity in Fitness & Diet

26:15 Letting Go of One-Sided Love - Reader Question #2

27:27 Focus on Those Who Choose You

29:12 Moving on from Unrequited Love

30:53 Letting Go to Grow

32:49 Balancing Cost and Effort in Relationships - Reader Question #3
39:43 Prenups & Financial Conversations - Reddit Question

43:30 Trust and Tough Conversations in Love

51:30 Outro (Subscribe, Comment, Follow us on social media)

Cringe Culture Is Killing Your Love Life | Ep. 18

Tue, 20 May 2025 13:43:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick talk about how the fear of being “cringe” is keeping you from real connection—and why embracing romance might be the most powerful choice you make.

Romance isn’t weakness. It’s intention. It’s action. It’s courage. And it has nothing to do with clichés—unless those clichés matter to you.

This is about showing up fully. Because the moment you stop performing and start caring, everything changes.

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:40 Defining Romance and Its Misconceptions

08:01 The Research Behind Romance and Relationships 11:56 Communication and Connection in Romance 14:49 Maintaining Passion in Relationships

16:17 Societal Views on Romance and Cringe

20:04 Ted’s Take on Love and Romance from Experience

22:53 Why Romance Isn’t a ‘Cheat Code’ in Relationships

25:40 The Importance of Romance in Relationships 28:10 Defining ‘Cringe'

28:40 Why Cringe is Killing Authenticity

29:50 Embracing Awkwardness for Growth 32:50 From School Judgments to Adult Social Fears

35:55 Rejecting Cringe and Embracing Authenticity

37:27 Attentiveness: The Foundation of Real Connection

41:05 Maintaining Attentiveness in Long-Term Relationships 43:15 Romance Is About Growth, Not Comfort 45:00 Your Relationship Is a Potted Plant—When to Repot It

47:54 Ted's Cringe-Worthy Romance Story

54:04 The Right Gift Is a Lesson in Who They Are

55:07 Patrick's Top 3 Tips on How to Reignite the Spark 55:30 #1 Maintain Connection in Relationships

1:02:04 #2 Show You Care

1:07:13 #3 Break Your Habits

1:08:48 Ted's 2 Sexy Habits That Build Intimacy

1:12:38 Embrace Vulnerability and Rejecting Cringe

1:15:20 Outro (Follow us on Social Media)

Fix Your Skin for $20! | Ep. 17

Thu, 15 May 2025 11:30:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick explore how cultural ideas about masculinity prevent many men from taking care of their skin, causing them to avoid basic skincare—often at the expense of their own comfort. They explain why this mindset needs to change, how to identify your skin type, and how to create a simple, affordable skincare routine for under $20. No fluff, no complicated 10-step processes—just clear skin and common sense. Enjoy!

Links to references mentioned in the episode

CeraVe https://www.cerave.com

Truck driver's severe sun damage on his left side after 28 years of UVA exposure through his window. https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/comments/10ke8k6/28_years_of_sun_exposure_made_the_left_side_of/ Timestamps 00:00 Intro 01:53 Demystifying Skincare 03:18 What Got Patrick into Skincare 04:53 Men and Skincare Challenges 06:05 Ted's Top 2 Tips for Skin Protection 07:02 Masculinity vs Skincare 10:53 Skincare Isn’t New – It’s Always Been a Thing 11:20 Ted on Being Fabulous—Take the Steps 12:27 The Basic Principles of Skincare 13:22 Know Your Skin Type 15:36 Skincare Doesn’t Need To Be Complicated 17:46 Patrick’s Skincare Tips 21:44 Patrick’s Skincare Non-Negotiables 25:09 How Ted Handles the Sun

27:23 Hygiene Rules Every Man Should Follow

31:00 Sunscreen and Skin Protection 32:22 Be Willing To Try Things

33:04 Ted's Skin Concerns and Routine

36:00 Patrick's Simple Skin Regimen

41:47 Facials, Pedicures & Spa Vibes

44:17 The Best Anti-Aging Secret

46:19 Retinol Basics and Tips

49:07 Scrubbing and Exfoliation Tips

50:27 Men's Makeup and Aging Gracefully

56:44 Key Takeaways

1:00:50 Outro

1:01:36 B-roll (TV References and Nostalgia, Dating Preferences and “Type”, Cultural Perceptions of Beauty)

How Dating Someone Older Can Fix You | Ep. 16

Tue, 13 May 2025 13:03:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the world of age gap relationships—breaking down the stigma, the history, and the real reasons behind why people choose partners much older or younger than themselves.From sugar daddying to genuine connection, they explore everything from Tracee Ellis Ross's preference for dating younger men to what age gap relationships can actually teach us about emotional maturity, relationship dynamics, and being honest about what we truly want. Enjoy!

Links to videos mentioned in the episode

Tracee Ellis Ross speaking with Michelle Obama https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsnPE5Hauio

Dennis Rodman Vice animation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3zDKkoNMcg&rco=1

Timestamps 00:00 Intro 01:19 The Social Stigma Around Age Gap Dating 01:58 The History of Age Gap Relationships 06:30 What Ted and Patrick define as an age gap relationship 10:53 Distinguishing between sexual relationships and those more than that 11:53 Tracee Ellis Ross shares her preference for dating younger men 18:20 Ted’s Lessons on Why Younger Women Date Older Men 24:00 Why Ted chooses to date younger women 33:42 Sugar daddying 37:45 What Age Gap Dating Can Teach You 39:55 Be Honest About What You Want in a Relationship 47:04 Ted's dating story 52:00 Patrick's thoughts on age gap dating now

54:30 Takeaway points on age gap dating

1:00:22 Follow us on social media

1:00:46 Broll (Michael Douglas, Dennis Rodman)

Men Think This Is Attractive - But Women Disagree Completely | Ep. 15

Thu, 08 May 2025 14:58:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick answer reader questions, starting with emotional suppression. Learn how to express yourself, build better habits, and why crying is ingrained in us. Next, long-term meaning and fulfillment. How do you avoid short-term gratification to build the life you want? Then, Olly Murs got fit, but why do Men and Women disagree on which part of his transformation looks better? After a quick detour on Ryan Reynolds, James Corden, Hugh Jackman, and Kieran Culkin, the episode ends with the hosts' responses to an “Am I The Asshole” Reddit thread exploring grief, family, and enforcing boundaries.

Links to referenced material:

Carl Rogers therapy session: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRCD3anKsa0

Sabrina Zohar reels: https://www.instagram.com/sabrina.zohar/reels/?hl=en

Jillian Turecki reels: https://www.instagram.com/jillianturecki/reels/?hl=en

Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski: https://www.amazon.com/Come-You-Are-Surprising-Transform/dp/1476762090

Olly Murs Twitter thread: https://x.com/imbethmccoll/status/1916513232845484340

Reddit thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/1kad2je/aita_for_refusing_to_go_to_my_grandmas_funeral/

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

00:50 - Plan for the episode

01:50 - Question about emotional suppression

03:50 - Crying isn’t the only way to feel sad

04:42 - Crying is deeply ingrained in us

06:00 - A habit of avoiding emotions

06:50 - Sad music as a release + Allowing yourself to feel sad

08:15 - Patrick’s visualization exercise

09:52 - These habits take a long time to break

11:13 - Patrick’s experience with not taking the time to process his emotions

13:24 - The inverse can also be true - too much time on emotions

15:03 - Emotions do NOT mean you’re broken

16:35 - Long-term meaning and fulfillment question

17:18 - Society tempts men with short-term gratification

18:06 - Build for YOUR future instead

19:12 - These don’t have to be chores

20:06 - Long-term meaning and fulfillment changes over time

21:03 - Build things that last for you and other people

22:37 - The person you spend your life with is YOU

23:20 - You don’t want to maintain every aspect of your life

24:26 - Creativity comes from doing

25:41 - Do not be afraid to fail

26:31 - Being interested in improving yourself is the first step

27:05 - Crucial concepts to get started with?

28:44 - Sharing book recommendations + Interesting people to listen to

30:30 - Surround yourself with stuff you’re interested in

32:45 - As long as it doesn’t hurt you it works

33:10 - Olly Murs and Attractiveness to men vs women

34:25 - Olly Murs fitness journey

34:59 - Men’s vs women’s opinions

36:45 - Your own lens of body image + Ryan Reynolds getting in shape

37:45 - Ted gets reasons from women

38:18 - Too self absorbed/committed?

39:02 - Guys have a different impression

39:58 - Do you want that body?

41:05 - Don’t try and be in a different category

42:14 - Fitness is what’s sustainable for YOU

44:09 - Women notice insecurities IMMEDIATELY

45:32 - Hugh Jackman and phases of being ripped

46:29 - Patrick’s opinion of Ryan Reynolds and James Corden

47:27 - English vs American perception of James Corden

48:20 - Kieran Culkin

50:11 - Am I the asshole?

55:35 - Only remembering the positive about someone is detached

56:58 - Neither angel nor devil

58:26 - It takes strength to push back on this

59:25 - Family is volatile

01:00:56 - B-roll (Fondling parchment, veiny goat skin, and funny kids stories)

#emotions #fitness #fit #fitnessgoals #grief #podcast #bodyimage #selfacceptance #reddit #redditstories

You Think You Know Yourself — Then You Become a Parent | Ep. 14

Tue, 06 May 2025 17:47:00 -0000

Becoming a parent doesn’t just change your life — it changes you. In this open and thoughtful episode, Patrick and Ted reflect on how fatherhood has shaped them as people. They share the challenges they’ve faced, the unexpected rewards they’ve discovered, and how their parenting styles have influenced not only their children but also their own personal growth. This conversation dives into how the way we parent doesn’t just affect our kids — it mirrors who we are and shapes who we become. From emotional ups and downs to the quiet lessons no one talks about, this is a real and honest look at the journey of parenthood — and why it may be the most powerful transformation of all.

Israeli parole board 2011 study: https://www.abajournal.com/news/article/study_of_israeli_parole_board_shows_why_good_scheduling_promotes_decisions

0:0:00 Intro

00:44:23 Navigating the Challenges of Parenthood

0:03:09 You are not truly busy until you have kids

0:05:15 Loneliness of parenthood

0:06:05 The toll newborns can have on the relationship - renegotiating your relationship with your partner

0:06:26 Postpartum Depression and loss of identity especially for women

0:07:00 You can never truly prepare for parenthood

0:08:56 The blessing of having grandparents or extended family around to help 0:10:04 How things can go wrong

0:10:54 Israeli parole board 2011 study

0:11:27 The impact of being depleted and stressed on our decision making 0:12:20 The importance of taking care of yourself so you can parent better

0:13:09 Understanding parenting frameworks

0:13:58 Imposter Syndrome and Feeling Incompetent as a Parent

0:14:26 You need a parenting framework to not impact the raising of your child

0:14:48 Philip Larkin - This be the verse

0:15:02 What parenting reminds Patrick of

0:15:20 The Balance of Discipline and Freedom in Parenting

0:16:30 Ted sharing example of gentle parenting

0:16:53 Older Generation Parenting styles (authoritative)

0:17:15 Downside/Impact of authoritative parenting on the child

0:17:35 Kids Need Connection, Not Control

0:20:08 parenting is harder than you think

0:20:53 Your Child Wants Connection—And Control

0:21:10 Gentle Parenting: A Modern Approach

0:21:51 Gentle parenting closely matches Authoritative parenting

0:23:11 Parenting by Default or Design?

0:23:43 Parenting Isn’t That Different from Coaching Football

0:24:49 Navigating Parenting Through Generational Changes

0:26:28 Parenting Without Shame: Choosing Gentleness Over Guilt

0:27:26 Gentle Parenting Starts With Self-Reflection

0:29:24 Patrick and Ted’s Parenting Experience (The Joys & Challenges)

0:37:26 It's Okay Not to Be Ready

0:39:58 Raising Kids in a Better World

0:41:34 Worrying About Being a Good Parent Means You’re On the Right Path

0:44:58 Principles of Gentle Parenting

0:50:29 How to React Better - Teaching Kids Consequences

0:55:52 Things to Remember

1:00:16 Points to Takeaway

Nobody Regrets Getting Fit — Here’s Why You Should Start Now | Ep. 13

Thu, 01 May 2025 14:45:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick discuss the world of fitness, emphasizing the importance of body composition, weight training, and sustainable habits for longevity and quality of life. They share personal experiences with body image, fitness journeys, and the common mistakes people make when pursuing fitness goals. Enjoy! Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526 Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast 00:00 - Intro 01:01 - Preconceptions of fitness 01:55 - Being fat kids 03:16 - Your goals will change as you age 04:55 - How did you feel about your body in different periods? 07:11 - Everybody who can exercise should do it 08:41 - “Fit” for what? 10:00 - Looking better = attracting higher quality partners 11:13 - Living in a period with more information than ever 12:30 - Mistakes Patrick made starting out 14:59 - Ted’s fitness journey 16:46 - Combining diet and exercise = sustainable 18:14 - Find something you love doing, or that you love the results of doing 19:28 - Fitness changes your life + increases in mobility/flexibility 20:49 - Is Patrick a masochist? + Gamifying running 22:08 - What was Patrick eating? 23:40 - Way to change your diet + How bad breakfast can be 25:26 - Drinking and liquid calories 26:13 - Moderation and not having a magic pill 27:55 - fitness is a lifestyle - make it sustainable 29:41 - Patrick is evangelical about weight lifting 30:30 - How easy it is to find a program online 31:49 - Pat’s pet peeve- going through the motions at the gym 32:18 - Focus on improvement every workout 33:37 - Ted disagrees - you can be casual and see massive results 34:07 - Choosing a body style that you are looking for 35:15 - Different expectations as you age 37:04 - Massive gains when you start and maintaining on less than you think 38:32 - Ted’s ex and strength vs size 40:15 - The benefits of yoga and stretching 41:51 - The 3 pillars of fitness 42:57 - Improving your quality of life is the goal of fitness 43:42 - Back issues can ruin your life 44:05 - Fitness also helps you have a better sex life 47:15 - NEAT and gaining/losing weight after parenthood 48:25 - Gaining muscle and cardio + footballers after retiring 49:11 - Take the walking options and conscious snacking 50:33 - Don’t do something you hate - find what’s right for you 51:40 - Don’t be intimidated 53:21 - Find programs who have the same issues as you + Story time 55:19 - Your body is going to change 56:17 - Your goals will take time, get comfortable with the process 57:42 - Give yourself compliments as well 58:47 - Topics we will cover in the future 59:37 - Respect that past you has made an effort for future you #fitness #weightloss #musclebuilding #bodyimage #gym #cardio #workout #fitnessmotivation #fitnessjourney #fitnesslifestyle #selfimprovement #fyp #foryou

The Real Reason Relationships Fail (It’s Not What You Think) | Ep.12

Tue, 29 Apr 2025 14:05:00 -0000

In this episode, Patrick and Ted talk about what makes relationships last. They discuss choosing the right partner, the skills needed to keep love strong, and the tough decision of whether to stay or leave. They also explore the grief of losing shared memories and the often-ignored regrets people have in relationships. They challenge stereotypes about divorce, discuss the role of romance (especially for men), and share personal stories about love.

Referenced articles:
Gretta Duleba – https://integrationbyparts.substack.com/p/how-relationships-actually-work
Aella – https://aella.substack.com/p/the-difficulty-in-dating-good-men

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

02:19 - Introducing the Topic of Relationships

03:49 – What We Mean by 'Romantic Relationships'

04:46 – Pressure on Romantic Partners Today

05:17 – Most Important Conversation to Have

05:46 – Clarifying Needs and Expectations Expectations Early On

06:46 – Understanding Boundaries and What You’re Looking For

06:19 – Age Gap Relationships and Shifting Viewpoints

06:36 – Cornerstone vs. Capstone Relationships

07:30 – Life Stage and Relationship Expectations

08:51 – The Myth of "The One"

08:26 – The Dangers of Over-Complicating Your Partner List

09:13 - Compatibility Beyond Red Lines

10:04 - Avoiding Blind Commitment in Relationships

10:22 - Knowing When to Leave

10:44 - Balancing Flexibility with Non-Negotiables

11:15 - Gretta Duleba's Article

14:29 - Unspoken Assumptions in Relationships

15:19 – Matching Relationship Structures

16:00 - Relationships as Tightropes

18:20 – Conversations and Skills for Relationship Health

19:32 – Renegotiating Relationships as Life Changes

20:40 – Cultural and Familial Influence on Relationship Beliefs

22:07 – Power of Open Conversations

23:30 - Navigating Unspoken Agreements

24:00–Balancing Companionship and Intimacy in Modern Love

25:40 - Adapting to Changes Together

27:42 - The Reality of Your Twenties

29:50 - Aging, Longevity, and How Relationships Change

30:21 - Finding Stability in a Changing World

31:00 - Listen to How You Feel in Relationships

32:04 - Friendships and Emotional Health

32:18 - The Importance of Self-Awareness in Relationships

33:12 - Understanding Fear in Relationships

33:40 - Relationship Skills That Really Matter

34:10 - The Importance of Decision Making in Relationships

35:08 - Repairing Emotional Wounds

35:24 - Ted's Breakup Story and Self-Reflection

38:00 - Why Repair Is Essential in Relationships

38:11 - Rebuilding Parent-Child Relationships

38:38 - Swallowing Ego for Relationship Resilience

39:28 - Rupture and Repair in Therapy

41:22 - The Challenge of Being Comfortable in Therapy

41:43 - Confronting Difficult Family Dynamics

43:26 - How Honest Conversations Repair Relationships

44:33 - Co-Creation: Building Relationships Together

45:14 - How Life Transitions Change Relationship Phases

47:12 - Resilience and Safety

48:07 - Co-Creation Commitment

51:17 - Navigating Differences in Relationship Expectations

51:40 - Understanding the Limits of What Partners Can Give

52:46 - Turning Conflict into Growth

53:10 - Personal Growth and Boundaries

54:30 - Self-Discovery in Relationships

57:45 - The Future of Relationships

59:03 - Approaching Relationships as a Curiosity Project

1:00:00 - Modern Dating Challenges and the Pursuit of a Match

1:05:58 - High Expectations in Modern Dating

1:10:42 - Patrick Questioning Religion and Personal Identity at 16

1:13:38 - Addressing Anger

1:15:37 - Ted on the Impact of Abandoned Relationships

1:16:51 - Developing Real Relationship Skills

1:17:25 - What’s Next

1:17:45 - Ted on Romance and Relationship Skills for Men

Masculine Rage, Becoming a Dad, and Shaming Sexuality | Ep. 11

Thu, 24 Apr 2025 09:03:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick discuss the challenges of long-distance relationships, the complexities of masculinity and anger management, and the joys and hardships of becoming a father. Then, they react to Reddit threads and share their insights and opinions on the authors’ posts. How should you navigate conversations in your relationship and when should you go to therapy to deal with trauma? Enjoy! AITA thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/1j0qx5w/aita_for_not_hugging_my_girlfriend_after_she/ Sexuality Thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/1jyph9f/how_to_get_rid_of_shame_around_sexuality/ Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526 Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 00:36 Going through reader comments and Reddit therapy 02:16 Navigating long distance relationships 03:01 There are many ways to make a long-distance relationship work 07:48 The Challenge of Transitioning to Close Proximity After Long-Distance 08:25 The Importance of Space in Early Relationships 09:32 Patrick and Ted Discuss How Independence Strengthens Relationships 11:12 Understanding masculinity and anger 17:27 Anger can be a tool - not just a reaction 24:06 The Challenges of parenting 25:18 The Joys of Parenthood 28:59 Finding balance in parenting and personal life 30:57 The Evolution of Parenting Practices 31:54 Ted Discusses Aging and the Shift in Parenting and Society 33:45 It’s Okay to Say No to Lending Money 34:15 Exploring Sexuality and Shame - Reddit Question #1 40:39 How long does trauma therapy take? 45:40 Communication in Relationships: Navigating Conflict - Reddit Question #2 51:10 B-Roll - The wildest Sushi Date ever 56:48 Why Ted’s Dating Life is Taking Him to Eastern Europe 58:58 The Mystery Behind Russian Women’s Anger 01:01:32 Is Our Attraction to Certain Ethnicities Hardwired? #masculinity #longdistancerelationship #anger #angermanagement #parenthood #dad #reddit #redditstories #therapy #longdistance #relationship #selfimprovement #podcast #fyp #foryou

What You’re Doing WRONG on Your Dating Profile (And How to Fix It!) | Ep. 10

Tue, 22 Apr 2025 15:07:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick are joined by Alina, a dating coach. They go over the do's and don'ts of a dating profile (with examples!), how to choose the best photos for the apps, and why you might not be getting matches. Then, they improve the profiles of two of our listeners! Enjoy.

Singles Party: https://zalevska.webflow.io/korporatyv-eng

Alina's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alinazalevska/reels/?hl=en

Alina's TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@alina_in_london

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@UCQ6DefpjKgqp7nT-h30CO5w

Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

02:17 - Why Alina may sound familiar

03:30 - Quality and Quantity

04:50 - The initial reaction to Ted's profile

06:18 - Ted's shirtless photo + why it was bad

08:23 - How do you adjust women's profiles to get higher quality matches?

10:51 - Choosing photos that represent you well

12:50 - Different levels of connection

13:57 - READ the profiles!

15:26 - Patrick can't handle it anymore

16:00 - How profiles differ between men and women

17:25 - Good vs Bad examples

20:42 - The first picture must be a selfie/portrait, #2 = Full body

22:36 - You can't be lazy with your profiles

24:19 - Bad photo examples

25:53 - Male friends should go on photograph sessions

27:30 - The other pictures must tell us about your life

28:45 - The wrong way to present your life

31:57 - Should women post their children? What about men?

34:46 - Alina's profile if she was lazy

37:00 - If you don't have the pictures you MUST invest time to get them

39:08 - Do men need to be told what's attractive about them?

42:08 - Write what you are looking for

46:42 - Our first volunteer (kyle)

47:55 - The photos had potential, he just needs to show it

48:30 - The first photo needs to not be so close up

49:08 - Kyle's written descriptions and more photos

50:09 - Your profile gives off subconscious signals

50:43 - How guys can show off their body

52:31 - Don't be too specific in your descriptions

54:21 - The music is appealing, but it's not about him? + Better photos

55:47 - We want to see you - not your friends

57:04 - How Kyle's profile should look

58:25 - Examples of a bad profile

59:35 - Choosing questions on Hinge

01:03:53 - The impact of better photos

01:04:48 - Volunteer #2 (Will)

01:05:14 - The pictures Will chose

01:06:37 - The description

01:07:37 - He has to give more information, but in a certain way

01:09:44 - Instead of writing about selfies - learn to do it!

01:10:56 - The second part of the description (+ a huge mistake)

01:12:11 - This profile could be so interesting with a few tweaks

01:14:10 - Additional photos of Will

01:15:44 - Alina's version of his description

01:18:11 - Give us feedback Kyle and Will!

01:19:52 - Alina's singles party

01:22:31 - Where to find Alina

01:23:13 - B-Roll (Color coordinating, sex party clothes, and Patrick committing crimes)

I Couldn’t Stop Overthinking — Until I Tried This | Ep. 9

Thu, 17 Apr 2025 12:51:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick explore the concept of fear casting, a technique for overcoming anxiety and overthinking by defining worst-case scenarios and analyzing potential outcomes. They discuss the importance of acknowledging fears, understanding the likelihood of negative outcomes, and taking actionable steps to mitigate risks. They also share personal stories from their lives and what they learned from them. Enjoy!

Tim Ferriss’ Fear-Setting: https://tim.blog/2017/05/15/fear-setting/

Andrew Garfield on Grief and Heartbreak: https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/andrew-garfield-says-movies-that-explore-grief-like-we-live-in-time-give-people-a-chance-to-be-together-in-our-sorrow-110027071.html?guccounter=1

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@UCQ6DefpjKgqp7nT-h30CO5w

Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

01:17 - Fear casting/Fear-setting

02:45 - People with a bias towards action vs bias towards thinking

03:39 - The earlier you encounter these ideas the earlier you can improve choices

05:26 - Ted doesn’t use it

06:58 - Why it works for Tim Ferriss

07:21 - Ted’s experience with this

08:16 - The unknown is more terrifying than reality

09:10 - Jaws is scary for this reason

10:52 - Step 1 - Write down your fear to define it

11:45 - It also gives you something to talk to someone else about

12:40 - Step 2 - What do I do if the nightmare came to be?

13:23 - Patrick’s fear and how he overcame it

14:26 - Overthinkers think they’re less in charge than they are

15:41 - People like helping other people

16:09 - Step 3 - What are the more probable outcomes?

17:39 - Failure doesn’t kill you

19:28 - What is it costing you to postpone action?

21:09 - What are you waiting for?

22:26 - A process Ted designed

24:54 - Fear can make intelligent people behave in stupid ways

26:00 - Saying “Do it” just does not work

26:34 - Giving your fear form makes it concrete

27:29 - This process is much easier in retrospect + Patrick’s worst nightmare

29:58 - Patrick could have done this originally without freaking out

30:38 - Ted shares a similar story about a horrific night

32:42 - This taught him he could deal with things

33:06 - The funniest moment Ted shares about his kids

33:54 - An Interesting transition

34:19 - Andrew Garfield on grief and heartbreak

35:20 - You can love stronger if you’re willing to take risks

37:13 - Great people failed before they succeeded, failure isn’t the end of the world

37:56 - Think “how can I feel this again” instead of shying away from it

38:39 - Is this going to change my value as a person?

39:57 - Give this a try and let us know your experiences!

40:58 - Nobody’s judging what you do - internalize that

42:52 - B-Roll (creating mythology around their lives and attributing things to the wrong friend)

Speak Their Love Language... Before It’s Too Late | Ep. 8

Tue, 15 Apr 2025 12:19:00 -0000

In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive deep into the 5 classic love languages (and why they actually matter), explore how they show up in real relationships, and call out the common ways men miss the memo completely. From physical touch and acts of service, to why gifts aren’t greedy, we unpack it all. Enjoy!

Esther Perel’s 7 verbs: https://www.estherperel.com/blog/7-verbs

Social Clip discussion: https://x.com/CandiceHorbacz/status/1906775409452048592?t=E45VojhWxhmsrecgRN2LNQ&s=19

Study by Impett, Park and Muise: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/09637214231217663

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@UCQ6DefpjKgqp7nT-h30CO5w

Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

00:58 - How Patrick was introduced to love languages

01:53 - Kanye Interlude

02:44 - The 5 love languages and what they mean

04:06 - Better versions of these quizzes

05:12 - You’ll likely have one that’s dominant

06:10 - Ted’s absent love language

07:09 - How he’s tried to improve the deficit

07:25 - Difficulty with quality time

07:42 - Patrick’s dominant love language + Ted’s hard boundary

08:51 - The assumption that underlies love languages

10:11 - Degrees of physical touch and sleep separation

11:29 - The complexity of gift giving

12:09 - Ester Perel’s 7 verbs

13:34 - Expected gifts vs unexpected

14:30 - Social media clip discussion

15:39 - Being thoughtful about cooking vs doing it as a duty

17:02 - Unseen acts of service

18:39 - Expecting to read each other’s mind

19:31 - You NEED a highly communicative, vulnerable relationship

21:25 - Don’t treat your partner like a roommate

22:25 - A lot of people try to get away with doing as little as possible

24:14 - Working back up after a period of less affection + Quality time varieties

25:21 - Banning phones to have REAL conversations

26:29 - Downsides to this approach to love languages

27:34 - Linklater’s series

28:52 - Communication doesn’t have to be verbal

30:08 - Love languages as a tool, not absolutes

31:18 - Thoughtful gift giving

33:09 - Songs as subtle gifts or acts or service

35:11 - Love languages in conjunction with attachment styles

36:14 - Sharing memes as a love language

37:49 - FUNTY

39:31 - Would sharing memes be quality time?

40:06 - Reacting to peoples voices

41:03 - The importance of doing this with children

41:33 - More on Ted’s efforts to intentional and vulnerable

43:23 - Patrick’s efforts to work on love languages

44:40 - Internal dialogue and how you speak to yourself

45:35 - Why you should read the 7 Verbs (linked above)

47:15 - Love languages are a result of childhood absence or fondness?

49:19 - Scarce things feels precious

50:37 - Leave follow up questions down below!

51:39 - B-Roll (Instagram, Enjoying lifting, Patrick’s treasured memory, and My Fair Ladying a friend)

Behind Every Success Is a Trail of Failures | Ep. 7

Tue, 08 Apr 2025 12:44:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into Success and Failure. The conversation starts with how failure is taught to be a bad thing from an early age, yet it often leads to the most growth. Next comes risk taking, which can be scary due to finding the limit of your abilities, which can lead to someone not trying. To end the episode, Ted shares the success and failures of his career, what he learned from each failure, how he learned from his failures to propel himself forward, and finding the thing the gives you purpose. Enjoy!

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 - Intro

01:19 - Failure is a good teacher

02:47 - Go out and do interesting/hard things

03:58 - 2 kinds of failure

06:28 - No risk, no story

07:10 - Patrick’s experience not trying

08:56 - There’s a limit somewhere

10:00 - Imposter syndrome

12:43 - We’re programmed to be risk averse, but we have so many fewer risks now

15:38 - Life is not school, failure is ok

17:33 - Ted and Pat are real people with real experiences

19:25 - Statsbomb

20:14 - Ted’s history of success - starting as an athlete

21:27 - College and learning how to try

22:05 - Dropping out of graduate school

22:31 - The meandering path of Ted’s career

23:36 - Success at age 25, but not happiness

24:33 - Magic the gathering and sports betting

25:54 - Getting into football and winning a title

27:04 - Founding Statsbomb and gaining financial independence

28:47 - The failures along the way - a boring job with a horrible boss

29:42 - The .com crash and delivering pizza

30:12 - Editing starcitygames and then Magic

30:54 - quitting/getting fired

31:48 - Getting into sports betting with no training

32:56 - How did these choices feel to you at the time?

33:55 - Accepting interesting opportunities

34:37 - Knowing you have value so the failures don’t question your self-worth

36:28 - Divorce when young

37:27 - Rebuilding pinnacle + losing $63K on the day 1

38:36 - Learning to be successful at sports betting

39:29 - Was the stress addicting

40:33 - Nearly getting fired in 2010

42:25 - Not letting it stop his career

43:27 - When did you realize your political naivety?

44:55 - Choosing to spend more time with children

45:59 - The football side of things + getting fired for job hunting

47:07 - Starting statsbomb due cancer

47:59 - Great timing

49:05 - Great people in history have failures that lead to success

50:25 - Larry Miller and spending no time with family

52:30 - The stress of the last 2 years of Statsbomb

53:43 - The crowning moment of your career and everything is falling apart

55:13 - Acknowledging the good

57:20 - The biggest thing people look back on

58:14 - This conversation wouldn’t be happening without Statsbomb

59:00 - New projects to keep yourself occupied

59:42 - Writing, video games, and finding meaning in something

01:00:40 - Pat’s time at Football Daily

01:01:41 - Finding YOUR OWN definition of success

01:02:40 - Learn to love the work

01:03:57 - Not just the work, but other things in life

01:05:57 - Embrace failure, learn to feel better and find meaning in life

01:07:53 - It’s a marathon not a sprint

01:09:32 - Volunteer to having your dating profile reviewed by an EXPERT

The TRUTH About Why You Push People Away | Ep. 6

Thu, 03 Apr 2025 12:14:00 -0000

On Today's episode, Patrick and Ted dive deep into attachment styles and how it shapes our relationships and self-understanding. They look at the origins of attachment style, the "Strange Situation", and the different categories people fall into. They also discuss their own attachment styles, how their styles have impacted relationships, and strategies to combat the difficulties your attachment styles may bring you. Enjoy!

Listen to us on Megaphone (or find our RSS Feed!): https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/VI9326253269?selected=VI1151133526

Learn more about attachment styles: attachmentproject.com

Dr. Kirk Honda: https://www.youtube.com/c/PsychologyInSeattle

One option to find a therapist (changeable locations): https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

Another option (UK only):

https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/

Slutstack podcast: https://sluts.substack.com/p/slutstack-ep1

Timestamps:

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:27 - Attachment Theory

00:02:24 - Attachment specialists in the therapy world + attachmentproject.com

00:03:23 - Dr. Kirk Honda - Psychology in Seattle

00:04:33 - Attachment theory overview

00:05:45 - Questions about the research

00:07:19 - The “Strange Situation”

00:08:00 - The procedure and roles

00:09:09 - Categories of attachment and what they mean

00:11:58 - We are not locked into these categories

00:13:12 - Engagement preferences

00:13:52 - What these styles look like in adulthood

00:14:51 - You seek out the familiar in relationships

00:16:19 - The first time you have a healthy relationship it feels WRONG

00:16:48 - How anxiously attached people handle things

00:18:10 - Ted’s experience with making choices

00:19:18 - Certain styles make you prone to self sabotage + Anxious vs avoidant behaviors

00:20:52 - Avoidant people and independence + Extreme stress

00:23:11 - Disorganized attachment is a little bit of both

00:24:18 - Ted being mildly avoidant + experiences

00:25:59 - Rejection and attachment styles

00:28:14 - Patrick’s attachment styles vs his wife’s

00:30:09 - Anger and conflict resolution

00:31:34 - Argumentational style

00:33:52 - Anxious people can remain calm yet be mad for a long time

00:34:51 - Avoidance and being afraid to get too close

00:37:02 - Secure could actually be avoidant

00:38:21 - Are things bugging you?

00:39:09 - Hedonism’s real meaning

00:39:58 - Avoiding highs and lows vs. choosing potential pain

00:41:47 - Start by recognizing within yourself

00:43:20 - Recognizing red flags

00:44:37 - Donkeys in our comments (just a few!)

00:47:33 - Attachment styles compared to medicine

00:50:10 - Ted’s thoughts on the back metaphor + Yoga

00:52:10 - There’s no magic bullet and CBT

00:53:18 - The power of writing things down

00:55:22 - Are we stuck with out attachment styles?

00:56:13 - Recognizing patterns

00:58:37 - Resisting our impulses and instinctive reactions

01:03:26 - Look at the core beliefs you have developed

01:05:04 - Ted’s worry about being alone

01:06:23 - He knows it’s incorrect, but can’t get it out of his head

01:07:01 - The process yields results

01:08:25 - Look for resources produced by people in the field of psychology

01:10:26 - B-Roll (Slutstack, Patrick’s haircut, Pajama rich, and Ted’s hair)

We TRIPLED my dating matches in an hour - Here's How! | Ep. 5

Tue, 01 Apr 2025 12:30:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick do a deep dive on dating apps. What are the differences Men and Women see on the apps, which apps are best for which purpose, and which one is the right app for you? Then, Ted shares his experiences with improving his dating profile thanks to help from his friend Alina. What mistakes did he make, how did he fix them, what impact did they have on his matches, and what can YOU learn from them? Enjoy!

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:28 - Demographics matter on dating apps, and so do populations

00:04:50 - Go where the ratio is favorable to you + optimizing your energy spent

00:06:15 - Ted’s experience and why we’re doing this episode

00:07:30 - Women are getting between 5x and 20x more matches

00:09:13 - Match.com owns 80% of all app traffic

00:10:32- Men are responsible for 96% of revenue + Grindr was first

00:11:47 - AI’s influence on these apps

00:13:04 - The distribution of attractiveness + Male to female ratio on apps

00:14:39 - Reported male heights on Tinder

00:17:30 - More Male vs Female statistics on apps

00:18:36 - Other dating apps besides Tinder (Bumble and Hinge)

00:20:44 - How do they differ and how are they the same?

00:21:57 - Check your local area to determine which app is best for you

00:22:24 - Raya and Ben Affleck

00:23:54 - Age gap relationships

00:25:59 - Fetish sites + Feeld

00:29:51 - Seeking Arrangements + their new marketing pitch

00:33:05 - The meat of the episode (Ted’s profile getting eviscerated by Alina)

00:36:13 - Ted’s profile before help

00:37:44 - DO NOT just scroll photos

00:39:35 - Patrick shows off + Alina’s comments

00:41:27 - Think ELEGANT + sober

00:43:30 - Ted’s shirtless photo + Alina audio

00:44:35 - Ted’s thought process behind the photo

00:46:02 - When shirtless photos are ok + MORE audio from Alina

00:50:10 - Male mindset + feeling good about yourself because of discipline

00:52:43 - The prompts before help + Patrick’s hatred of misspelled words

00:54:50 - Humor in messages after you match, but be interesting to create conversation in your prompts

00:57:17 - Why Ted hated answering these prompts

00:57:47 - Alina wasn’t all mean! + photo improvements

00:59:48 - Consider professional photographers to help your pictures stand out

01:02:41 - Improved prompts after Alina’s input

01:05:02 - Adding depth gives more for people to go off of + experts are so quick to make massive changes

01:06:03 - The changes Ted noticed + doubling his matches

01:08:39 - Ted’s dating range + factors that matter more than age

01:10:58 - Experts focus in on the right things + Has it made the experience more enjoyable?

01:13:10 - Women get so many matches it’s overwhelming - don’t get frustrated

01:14:30 - Women are tired of men being too insecure to let someone get to know them

01:15:54 - DON’T bring up your exes

01:16:52 - Fun social media post about red flags

01:21:06 - Dating mindset + Actions speak louder than words

01:25:03 - B-roll (zoomers, Americans, religion and Thanosing people)

The Blueprint to FIXING Your Dating Life - Ep. 4

Thu, 27 Mar 2025 13:00:00 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the complexities of dating, exploring its various phases, the importance of connection, and the significance of understanding one's own needs and boundaries. They also talk about the evolution of dating from casual to partnership, being the product on dating apps, and open communication and learning from bad dates. Enjoy!

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:27 - Dating and ways to think about dating

00:02:59 - Dating as a construct

00:03:40 - Phase one: Sex

00:05:26 - Phase two: Connection

00:10:20 - The exciting elements of dating

00:12:43 - You must understand your hard boundaries

00:13:40 - Phase three: Partnership

00:14:44 - Navigating Responsibilities and anchors as you age (especially children)

00:16:20 - Open relationships/polyamoury

00:18:14 - Knowing yourself allows you to find the right partner for you

00:20:01 - Dating commentators + actions speak louder than words

00:23:17 - Getting through the door + texting is not a relationship

00:25:00 - Be honest about your needs

00:26:20 - You want somebody who LOVES to see you

00:27:48 - Matching Libidos

00:30:05 - The sexual side of culture has shifted in the last 10 years

00:31:08 - Phases where relationships are mostly sexless

00:32:34 - YOU are the product

00:33:45 - Presenting yourself as a Partner + What qualities women look for in men

00:35:46 - 1989 dating section anecdote + How we’re going backwards

00:38:09 - Engaging in meaningful conversations

00:41:27 - Being a product on dating apps

00:43:23 - Patrick’s INSTANT NO

00:44:23 - BE MORE FIT

00:45:23 - Be funny and charming

00:47:32 - Intelligence is an indicator that you might be a good partner

00:49:06 - Are you able to remove the gendered element?

00:51:25 - It’s all about getting through the door initially

00:52:48 - Be interested

00:55:59 - Listening proves active involvement in a relationship

00:58:13 - These concepts are applicable to many aspects of life, not just dating

01:00:10 - Be Interesting + don’t talk too much about your past

01:02:49 - Love languages on a first date?

01:04:25 - Listen to people when they tell you who they are

01:07:33 - Dating past a certain age means you’re done with BS

01:09:38 - Don’t waste other people’s time

01:11:26 - The many things to consider around having more kids

01:14:12 - Dating should be FUN

01:14:50 - Dating as a process and learning to filter better

01:16:11 - Does Ted enjoy dating now?

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Power of Radical Honesty + Why Being Offended is a CHOICE | Ep. 3

Tue, 25 Mar 2025 14:16:51 -0000

On this episode, Patrick and Ted dive into Radical Honesty. What does it mean, how should you implement it, and when do people take it too far? They also get into the helpfulness of meditation, arguing in constructive ways, two truths, and benefit of the doubt. Enjoy!

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:50 - Radical honesty and how much dishonesty is in our lives

00:03:12 - Ted's history with Radical honesty

00:05:09 - Is our internal monologue honest?

00:06:51 - Being Self-Centered

00:08:18 - Honesty when interacting with other people

00:09:58 - If you find problems everywhere, maybe you're the problem

00:11:09 - How people misuse radical honesty

00:13:29 - Applying the stick but never the carrot

00:15:01 - Charlie Munger's wish for his children

00:17:08 - Compassionate self-talk

00:18:23 - Where to draw the line

00:19:01 - To what extent do you practice radical honesty?

00:21:53 - It can take away your self control

00:23:45 - Differing cultural expectations

00:25:02 - Holding feelings in can lead to explosions

00:26:29 - Meditation

00:29:57 - Two truths

00:33:20 - Shared truths when relationships end

00:35:01 - Learning to hate the person you love to end relationships

00:36:59 - Different styles of reasoning

00:39:18 - Arguing in constructive ways

00:41:57 - When compromise is not possible

00:43:14 - Benefit of the doubt and being offended is a choice

00:46:12 - Develop an unshakeable core

00:48:48 - Knowing that you've done all you can

00:51:50 - B-Roll - Ted decorating his house from scratch

00:56:04 - Americans and their perception of the UK

00:56:37 - Paris Syndrome and Parisian attitudes

00:59:20 - Parisian/London Underground style

01:02:45 - Big cities are generally similar, no matter where they are|

01:03:20 - Overstimulation from foreign countries

#honesty #selfimprovement #selfimprovement #wellness #menswellness #mentalhealth #podcast #radicalhonesty #selfhelp #relationship #foryou

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Are Men PIGS or is it Wiring? + Sex, Kinks, and Boundaries | Ep. 2

Thu, 20 Mar 2025 13:54:34 -0000

On this episode, Patrick and Ted discuss all things sex. They start with the evolution of sexual culture, the role of dating apps, and the importance of understanding attraction and preferences. Along the way they dive into peak age of attraction differences between men and women, submissiveness and what we can learn from it, the benefits of physical touch, and the importance of self-reflection. Enjoy!

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 - Introduction to the Podcast and Topic of Sex

02:44 - Navigating Changes in Sexual Norms

05:35 - The Impact of Dating Apps on Modern Relationships

08:29 - Exploring Sexual Attraction and Preferences

11:24 - The Role of Kinks and Submissiveness in Relationships

13:20 - The difference in Age of peak attraction between Men and Women

20:30 - Kinks and the awareness of them

23:10 - Submissiveness, Height, and what we can learn from Aella's study

27:04 - Compatibility and the ethics of desires

34:57 - Learning from Disagreements/Arguments

38:28 - Exploring Sexual Identity

44:14 - The Complexity of Attraction

49:27 - Navigating Personal Boundaries

55:32 - The Importance of Self-Reflection

58:33 - Evolving Relationships and Communication

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Why men NEED stronger friendships + Learning how to cry | Ep. 1

Tue, 18 Mar 2025 14:12:08 -0000

On this episode, Ted and Patrick discuss all things male friendship related. Why are these friendships so important, where do people find their friends, and what are steps you can take to improve these relationships? They also discuss how to find a therapist, having to relearn how to cry, and the challenges of parenthood and friendship. Enjoy!

One option to find a therapist (changeable locations): https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

Another option (UK only):

https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast

Timestamps:

00:00 - Introduction and Podcast Mission

02:03 - The Gap in Culture for Male Conversations

02:46 - Incorporating Guests and Improving Lives

04:27 - Male Friendships and Emotional Support

05:00 - Generational Stoicism and Masculinity

06:10 - Impact of COVID on Friendships

07:33 - Support Systems in Relationships

08:45 - Vulnerability in Friendships

09:30 - How to Build and Improve Friendships

10:55 - Creating More Social Connections

12:03 - Building Habits in Friendships

14:52 - Expanding Social Networks and Finding Partners

15:43 - Ted’s Experience with Friendships and Leadership

20:29 - Struggles with Maintaining Friendships

24:25 - The Emotional Toll of Startup Life

25:34 - Finding a Therapist and Mental Health Support

27:20 - The Importance of Processing Emotions

28:46 - Ted’s Support System and Friendship Check-ins

30:27 - Patrick’s Journey with Male Friendships

33:19 - The Challenges of Parenthood and Friendship

35:19 - Shared Experiences Strengthen Friendships

36:44 - Coping with the Physical and Emotional Strain of Parenting

38:26 - Reconnecting with Old Friends

39:41 - Maintaining Long-Distance Friendships

41:05 - Double Standards in Friendships

42:32 - The Importance of Being Vulnerable in Friendships

43:40 - Breaking Out of Isolation and Building Friendships

45:25 - Finding New Social Activities and Interests

47:33 - Complimenting Strangers and Building Warmth

49:06 - Planting Seeds in Friendships

50:16 - Learning How to Cry and Process Emotions

51:54 - Emotional Control and Repression in Startup Life

52:42 - Telling Friends You Love Them

54:07 - Exploring the Spectrum of Male Relationships

55:45 - Realizing You Have Agency in Friendships

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Male Vulnerability, Dating Apps, and Emotional Growth | Ep. 0

Tue, 18 Mar 2025 06:00:00 -0000

Originally recorded on the 17th of February, Ted and Patrick start by discussing the reasons behind them starting this podcast. They then explore the complexities of male vulnerability, dating culture, and the challenges faced by men in modern relationships. Along the way they discuss the impact of dating apps, personal experiences with breakups, and the importance of emotional growth and connection. Enjoy!

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw

X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/ ⁨@Mandownpodcast⁩

Timestamps:

00:00 - Introduction to the Podcast Journey

01:05 - Exploring Male Vulnerability in Film

02:43 - The Impact of Dating Culture on Men

04:00 - The Dating App Experience

06:47 - Understanding Dating Dynamics

09:22 - The Role of Marketing in Dating

11:17 - The Therapist's Perspective on Loneliness

13:29 - Navigating Expectations in Relationships

15:31 - Personal Reflections on Breakups

20:05 - Learning from Mistakes in Relationships

22:55 - Embracing Vulnerability and Romance

#mentalhealth #vulnerability #emotionalgrowth #dating #datingculture #datingapps #friendship #risktaking #loneliness

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.