Flat Bottom Girls

Sex is supposed to be ... fun?!

Wed, 07 Apr 2021 00:32:09 -0000

The girls sit down with Wendi Starling to talk about sex, non-monogamy, and body dysmorphia. Wendi is a NYC-based comedian, recently relocated to St. Louis during the pandemic, and might move to Austin in the future, and has many tales to share about her dating life.

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Don't Hate me, I'll Hate me

Mon, 22 Mar 2021 08:00:00 -0000

Remy Kassimer host of the well renowned podcast, How Cum joins FBG to talk meltdowns at the in-laws, the bachelor, and what it means to finally realize we don't give a f*ck what men think of us.

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Post Pandemic Makeovers

Mon, 15 Mar 2021 11:47:34 -0000

Maddy gets headshots and Jordan gets Vaccinated. The girls discuss the futility of adult bullying, internet trolls, cat callers, gen z and how they possibly might consider looking presentable post covid.

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Flat Bottom King

Tue, 09 Mar 2021 04:05:20 -0000

The hilarious Raanan Hershberg tells the FB girls about getting the vaccine and how it destroyed his self esteem. They discuss dating without getting blasted on Twitter, anti-depressants and a million dollar idea for a dating app for people who hate sex.

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Catching the "ICK"

Mon, 01 Mar 2021 10:00:00 -0000

Maddy and Jordan go through the things that men do that make them run for hills of Cringe and flee to the lands of We Must Breakup Immediately.

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Sagalow and the Horrible Hosts

Tue, 23 Feb 2021 00:27:10 -0000

This week Brendan Sagalow joins us and we talk about the horrors of being on a strangers podcasts, being children of divorce, Valentines day meltdowns and Brendan's new "haircut"

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Sex Laundry

Mon, 15 Feb 2021 03:03:40 -0000

Maddy and Jordan discuss the horrors of thongs and Jordan debriefs o about her love life. It's a shorty butt a goody.

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Big Man on Campus

Fri, 05 Feb 2021 01:40:29 -0000

The hilarious Casey James Solengo joins Maddy and Jordan this week to talk about the growing pains of hitting puberty at 21. When it comes to honesty about body shame the girls have met their match.

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I'll Hate My Body If I Want To.

Fri, 29 Jan 2021 02:48:48 -0000

This week Maddy and Jordan answer you perverts questions and discuss what should be feared and what shouldn't.

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No Naked People w/ Chloe Radcliff

Thu, 21 Jan 2021 03:08:11 -0000

Maddy and Jordan disturb their guest Chloe Radcliff with their repulsion to naked people. The episode starts off tame but goes widely off the rails into filthy terrain.

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Astrology and Trauma-Bonding

Thu, 14 Jan 2021 12:40:13 -0000

Libra vs Gemini. The manic co dependent vs the chill grudge holder. Can you guess who is who? We answer this and the rest of the questions you freaks sent in.

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Quarrels In Quarantine

Wed, 06 Jan 2021 12:39:54 -0000

This week we have Andrew Shivone! Host of the Anxiety Podcast as well as lover to our very own Maddy Smith. Andrew makes the critical folly of picking pre caffeinated fights. Jordan is still tragically single and tends to keep it that way.

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New Years Resolution: Don't Read the Comments

Fri, 01 Jan 2021 02:38:08 -0000

Maddy and Jordan discuss their love/hate relationship with Tik Tok and the trolls that be. They answer all the questions you submitted last week and more. If you're a man with a dog sit this one out.

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Michael Rowland's Morning Rituals

Fri, 18 Dec 2020 12:05:00 -0000

Comedy Central’s Michael Rowland and Jordan describes his quarentine rituals. Jordan decides she hates sex and Maddy hasn’t left her apartment.

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Carmen Lagala's FIRE Skincare Routine

Wed, 02 Dec 2020 12:12:10 -0000

Carmen Lagala (Late Show with Stephen Colbert) joins the Flat Bottom girls to discuss being one half of a quarantined couple, using dance as cardio, and of course her incredible skincare routine. One look at Carmen's glowing face will tell you that you must listen to find out her secret! Rate, review, and subscribe if you liked this episode!

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Maddy got Uggs!!

Wed, 25 Nov 2020 01:52:42 -0000

Maddy got Ugg boots to prep for winter and Jordan is working on her sleep schedule since lately she's been nocturnal but losing her mind. Luckily she bought retinol. Jordan also talks about the Covid symptoms she's had since March, like everything smelling like rotten beef. Fun!

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Winter Is Coming

Tue, 17 Nov 2020 01:03:15 -0000

The flat bottom girls discuss the impending doom that is winter and how to stay busy for the next six months. Also, all couples during quarantine are losing their minds.

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Biden turns GA blue and NYC into Coachella

Wed, 11 Nov 2020 00:12:21 -0000

Maddy and Jordan discuss the election mayhem, money shots and Maddy finds out to her horror... Jordan’s credit score.

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Post Election Whiplash

Wed, 04 Nov 2020 17:52:42 -0000

Maddy and Jordan recover from Halloween and prepare for tactics for the post election whiplash.

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Jordan Got Dosed

Thu, 29 Oct 2020 13:53:22 -0000

Maddy was supposed to do a fall getaway with her boyfriend but the AirBnb turned out to be a Nightmare-bnb! Meanwhile Jordan did drugs in the city per usual! The flat bottoms reign again!

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Sexipode: Maddy and Jordan Can Do It Themselves

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 04:00:00 -0000

Maddy and Jordan discuss their failure at diet's. Jordan re-considers her perspective on threesomes

And both of them agree on a fatal mistake men make in the bedroom.

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Maddy Blacked the F*ck Out on Her Birthday!

Wed, 14 Oct 2020 11:15:43 -0000

Maddy and Jordan recap Maddy’s birthday where she blacked out and sang sublime songs until 2 am and her boyfriend Andrew begged her to stop! The next day she hated herself. She does it every year! Ultimately maddy and Jordan and up discussing the annoying habit of guys who wear extravagant sneakers and terrible outfits. Red flag!

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Trump has COVID!!

Mon, 05 Oct 2020 21:42:54 -0000

The flat bottom girls discuss Donald Trump getting Covid after the presidential debate this week that was, in a word, unsettling! But the girls weren’t all political! They also discussed having babies and the potential for Jordan to raise Maddy’s babies! Fun!

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We Hate Ourselves!!

Mon, 28 Sep 2020 17:22:00 -0000

Jordan and Maddy talk self-loathe - where did it originate and why? From childhood weight issues to parental abandonment, the Flat Bottom Girls get into the root of their self-hating issues, and how it influences their lives and lifestyles today.

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Comedy Philosophy Part 2

Tue, 22 Sep 2020 22:21:00 -0000

Jordan and Maddy are once again picking apart the careers and lives they’ve chosen for themselves! They’re doing outdoor shows and panicking about the future of comedy. Enjoy!

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We Need Co-dependents Anonymous

Tue, 15 Sep 2020 01:37:26 -0000

Jordan naturally resists the notion of therapy but Maddy is really into it because her therapist has calmed her during the pandemic. Maddy talks about some of the shitty therapists she's dealt with and then the gals go off on a tangent about social media and how it's destroying their mental health more than a therapist could ever try to fix!

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Male doctors suck!

Mon, 07 Sep 2020 15:36:03 -0000

Jordan finally got the meds she needed for her hypo thyroid condition and her PMDD and she’s walking on air. Maddy reminisces on blacking out in upstate NY. They both agree that the thought of having sex with a stranger sounds awful.

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Philosophizing Stand Up

Tue, 01 Sep 2020 22:54:45 -0000

Jordan and Maddy have a lengthy discussion about their feelings on comedy, their careers, and some goals for moving forward as artists in an industry that is currently barely alive. They get into the nitty gritty of the stand up grind and the necessity of the “plan B” in a field where most of us are delusional.

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Wedding Dresses for Red Heads

Tue, 25 Aug 2020 18:22:03 -0000

Jordan and Maddy shoot da shit and talk about how unwell they’ve been this month and some of the routines they’ve been sticking to during this time. Jordan took a 3 hour bath to help her PMS and Maddy eats a lot of bread and calls it self care.

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Positive Pod

Mon, 17 Aug 2020 12:52:28 -0000

For the love of god a positive pod! Maddy and Jordan attempt to devise a plan on how to stay sane come fall and winter.

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What I Like About You

Mon, 10 Aug 2020 14:47:36 -0000

Jordan and Maddy discuss breakups and what they value in relationships. Jordan is going through a break up but understands why the relationship wouldn't work anyway. They also talk about sex vs. intellectual compatability in relationships and which is better.

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Jordan fixed her OCD with LSD

Mon, 03 Aug 2020 16:01:23 -0000

Maddy and Jordan continue to discuss phases of their life. Jordan talks about her experience with OCD as a kid and how an acid trip kinda fixed it. Maddy has an internal debate about doing shrooms which she may do this summer.

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Phase 2

Mon, 27 Jul 2020 11:36:32 -0000

Jordan and Maddy continue to discuss the phases of their life, going in depth to Maddy's depression tinder sex days and Jordan's tattoos.

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Phased Out

Tue, 21 Jul 2020 02:42:26 -0000

Jordan and Maddy tackle this week's topic: phases they've been through. From emo music and punk style to Urban Outfitters cardigans, they've done it all! Next week's episode will expand on this topic.

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First Love

Fri, 26 Jun 2020 01:43:01 -0000

The girls get together on Zoom to discuss this week's topic: first love. They also have a heated discussion about men's fashion. Enjoy!

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NYC Primaries: How to Vote

Mon, 15 Jun 2020 18:14:55 -0000

Jordan and Maddy talk about quarantine, protests, and then sit down with Noa Wesley to discuss the upcoming NY primary election and how to vote.

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Make Yourself at Home

Thu, 28 May 2020 22:49:06 -0000

Description: Maddy and Jordan catch up and discuss Nebraska, Maryland, and everything in between. This week's topic: things that are hard about staying in other people's homes.

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Do You Forgive Me?

Thu, 21 May 2020 09:00:00 -0000

The girls catch up virtually from their personal NYC hell holes and discuss the pros and cons of quarantine. They come to the conclusion that there are no pros! Nah jk. Then they cover this week's topic: a time when you forgave someone.

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It's British

Mon, 11 May 2020 19:58:11 -0000

Maddy and Jordan have a tipsy Michael Rowland back on the pod. This one is really off the rails and you will love it.

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Eavesdropping

Fri, 01 May 2020 07:16:37 -0000

Maddy and Jordan pod from their Brooklyn hovels to speculate on the aftermath of Covid, their coping mechanisms for Quarantine. They also spend a chunk of time eaves dropping on Jordan's neighbor having sex.

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Episode 6 From the Quarantine Bunker

Sat, 25 Apr 2020 18:30:21 -0000

Jordan and maddy record from home and talk about their quarantine.

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Episode 5 - Mike Rowland vs Peter from the Bachelor

Thu, 16 Apr 2020 17:31:46 -0000

Maddy Smith (Wild'n Out) and Jordan (JFL) sit down with Mike Rowland and discuss PMS, doggy style and a complete critical analysis of the most recent season of the Bachelor.

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Episode 4 - Caitlin Peluffo blacks out with the girls

Thu, 09 Apr 2020 19:19:13 -0000

Caitlin Peluffo, hot off the Late Show with Stephen Colbert, joins the Flat Bottom Girls to discuss this week's topic: what to do after blacking out. the gals discuss their college drinking habits and more. Thanks for listening!

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Episode 3 - Maddy and Jordan, 2 Girls No Guest

Wed, 01 Apr 2020 02:43:04 -0000

Maddy and Jordan fly solo and get into it about Wild N Out, the horrors of out of town friends, student debt, having kids, and how to steal from Wegmans.

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Episode 2 - Andrew Schiavone’s Guide to Tinder

Wed, 25 Mar 2020 12:08:01 -0000

The Flat Bottom Girls sit down with Andrew Schiavone (Panic Attacking podcast, Sirius XM, Maddy’s boyfriend) and discuss this week’s topic: fast food. Also, Jordan and Maddy debate the pros and cons of bowling. Got a topic you’d like to hear on the pod? Email flatbottomgirlspodcast@gmail.com.

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Episode 1 - First Episode?? Hell yea!

Fri, 20 Mar 2020 00:53:09 -0000

Guest Isabel Hagen just appeared on the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, and now she's sitting down with the Flat Bottom Girls to tackle this week's topic: how to feed yourself in NYC. Submitted by Maddy's sister, @friendilysmith. Shoutout to Emily! Want to submit a topic? Email flatbottomgirlspodcast@gmail.com. See you next week!

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Flatbottom Girls Coming Soon

Mon, 24 Feb 2020 23:02:23 -0000

Hosts Jordan Jensen (JFL) and Maddy Smith (Wild'n Out) cover topics sent in by you! Welcome to Flatbottom Girls!

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